


Imposter Syndrome

by DancouMaryuu



Category: Kidou Keisatsu Patlabor | Mobile Police Patlabor, Zootopia (2016)
Genre: Bodyswap, F/M, Gen, Self-Discovery, World-swapping, imposter syndrome
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-26
Updated: 2018-07-19
Packaged: 2019-05-17 18:25:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 22,262
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14836892
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DancouMaryuu/pseuds/DancouMaryuu
Summary: Judy Hopps is a rabbit who protects the law despite her small size.Noa Izumi is a human who protects the law from within a giant robot.When they find themselves in each other's bodies with only each other to confide in, they learn a bit about one another - and themselves - as they gradually find that there's more to their situation than first appears...





	1. Not My Uniform

**Author's Note:**

> Howdy, folks! Welcome to my first fanfic! I realize that many of you Zootopia fans may not have watched Patlabor (if you haven't, I highly recommend it), so I'll try and ease you into it. If I'm not doing so good a job of it, just let me know in a review!
> 
> For those of you who have seen Patlabor, this takes place in the TV series/New Files continuity.
> 
> You may occasionally see footnotes (you've probably noticed the "[1]" in that first paragraph below) to help explain the world of Patlabor to Zootopia fans or vice-versa, or even just for general trivia (SO MANY OBSCURE ANIMAL REFERENCES), plus the occasional [OST] footnote to denote the soundtrack for this pic! (and since this is AO3, I can post links with them! Yay!)
> 
> Special thanks to mahq.net for their extensive database on Labors!
> 
> So yeah! This is "Imposter Syndrome"! Enjoy!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noa Izumi is feeling down after an accident during a deployment.
> 
> Judy Hopps is questioning why she's on the force.
> 
> Little do they know their days are about to get a LOT worse!

"I tell ya!" crowed Isao Ohta, grinning so hard one would think one corner of his mouth would touch the other, "I tell ya it was prishless! That [Bulldog](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/hl-97.htm) pilot di'nt even know what hid'm!" **[** **1]**

"You've been saying that for the past while, Ohta!" grumbled Asuma Shinohara, wishing Ohta would pass out from all the drinks he'd had.

"Aren't you going to have something stronger?" said Takeo Kumagami, raising an eyebrow at the ice water Asuma was having.

"Listen, Kumagami." said Asuma, "I've learned that the only way to not get drunken under the table by Noa is to not drink at all."

"Hmm..." remarked Kumagami, pushing back her short black hair, "In that case, this next glass will be my last."

"Mmmmm..." said Noa Izumi, eyes staring off into space as she finished off her glass of _sake_.

It was Asuma's turn to raise an eyebrow. Noa seemed particularly untalkative this evening. He'd picked this bar for Division 2's night out specifically because it was near Noa's apartment, so it'd be easy for them to carry the hard-drinking barkeeper's daughter home if need be.

Asuma was about to ask what was wrong, but tall, gorilla-like Hiromi Yamasaki beat him to it. "Something wrong, Noa?"

"Oh, it's nothing..." Noa still seemed downcast. Asuma quickly realized why.

"Noa, it's alright!" he piped up, "We had no way of knowing how weak that abandoned subway tunnel was! It wasn't your fault it collapsed under Alphonse's weight!"

"Yes, it was!" Noa glared at Asuma, clearly showing the effects of slight inebriation, "I should have been more careful! I could have taken that guy down! Now Alphonse is all smashed up, and Ohta had to pick up the slack..."

Asuma frowned. Noa's affection for her Labor was usually an asset in the field, for it made her more careful and efficient, but when she thought she'd failed, that affection became a two-edged sword emotionally.

"Not that I'm complainin'!" crowed Ohta, raising his umpteenth glass, "That wacko didn't stand a chance against me! Consider yerself avenged, Izumi!"

"Asuma?" Noa said, staring at the bottom of her glass.

"Yeah?"

"Do you think I'm... losing my touch?"

"What? No!"

"It's just that I keep wondering if I've been lucky until now - that the real me isn't that good of a Labor pilot."

"Come on, Noa!" said Asuma, patting his co-worker on the back, "We all have off days! It's no big deal!"

"Yeah, I guess..." Noa eased herself off her seat and began to amble out of the bar. "You guys go on without me. Don't need me around dampening the mood..."

"You sure you don't need help?" said Hiromi.

"I'll be fine..." said Noa, "It's not that far..."

Asuma could only stare after his co-worker with a furtive look. Sometimes, he just did not understand her...

* * *

"So why did Chief Buffalo-Butt want to see you in his office?" asked Nick Wilde, eyes on the road ahead.

"Oh, that?" said Judy Hopps, suddenly snapped out of her thoughts, "He just wanted to know how Stoker and Jackson are settling in."

"Oh, yeah!" Nick grinned, recalling how much his fellow officers at the Zootopia Police Department were talking about Iona Stoker and Delia Jackson - the ZPD's first bat and first hare officers respectively. **[2]** "What did you tell him?"

"I gave him a few pointers about Jackson," said Judy, her lapine muzzle angling toward the window as she stared at all the mammals on the sidewalk, "Gave him some firsthand info about what it was like for me on my first days on the force. Stoker is... something else."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. I never actually met any bats in Bunnyburrow, and I never really got to know them until Stoker joined. Big ears are just about the only thing we have in common, it seems." Judy seemed despondent at this lack of connection with a fellow officer. "He was a bit worried about how most mammals regard bats."

"Hmmm... I might give him a few pointers. Dealt with a few of them myself back in my 'glory days'." the russet-colored fox gave his trademark eyes-half-lidded smirk as he recalled his own less-than-ethical past. "Of course, I'll have to remind him that the bats _weren't_ the most disreputable mammals involved in those transactions!"

"Shut it, you!" Judy chuckled, elbowing her partner in the ribs. "Statute of limitations, remember?"

"No elbowing the driver!" Nick chuckled in feigned fright.

"Anyway, Bogo seemed disappointed that I couldn't give him any ideas about Stoker." said Judy, "He said he wanted to find out how he could make the most out of all these new species - find out what assignments work best for 'em, that sort of thing. He said that since the ZPD's never had any bats before, he's got nothing to go on for Stoker."

Judy's black-tipped ears fell down to touch her back as the little grey rabbit stared out the window again. "Maybe _that's_ why he put me on parking duty when I first joined up..."

Nick began to look concerned. "Alright, Carrots. What's eating you?"

Judy sighed. "I guess with the Mammal Inclusion Initiative bringing in all these new species, I keep worrying they'll just be token officers - token bats, token jackrabbits, token otters, that sort of thing. I mean, _I_ was a token bunny at first. Sure, Bogo's gotten better, but I think he has a point - what happens if he can't find a way to play to these officers' strengths? I mean, I remember how I wanted to be a real asset to the force, make the world a better place and all that. I'll bet Jackson and Stoker and all the other Initiative officers want that too."

"As another Initiative officer, I can relate," said Nick, the ZPD's first fox officer, "but I think you're overthinking this. You're _not_ a token bunny. You're proving that every day we go on the beat, and honestly, I don't see myself as a token fox."

"Yeah, but I keep remembering that the M.I.I. only passed by two votes in the City Council. Where would I be now if it didn't pass? And even _with_ the Initiative, would I be a cop today if I _weren't_ a bunny?"

Nick sighed. "Now, you're _really_ overthinking it. Fact is, you're here, you've got that badge, you've taken down _two_ double-dealing mayors, you saved the entire goddamn city from tearing itself apart! You've _more_ than proven yourself!"

"Okay..."

"Tell you what, we can go chat up Stoker tomorrow - get the 411 on bats directly from her. If we get any ideas, we go to Bogo. Sound fair?"

Judy sighed. "Alright..."

* * *

Barkeeper's daughter or not, Noa Izumi was feeling just a little tipsy as she ambled toward her apartment. Still, she wasn't completely out of it.

She noticed some sort of small trailer a couple blocks out from the cart. It was a white trailer hooked up to a pickup truck. It resembled a horse trailer, only with a roll-up door cut into the side.. It was around then that she noticed her lace was untied, so she sat on a little ledge on the side of the trailer to tie it. However, when she put her back against the trailer, there was a loud **click** and the door opened, causing Noa to fall inside.

A muffled voice came from outside. "What was that?!"

Suddenly, the door fell shut, and a loud humming started, and Noa fell unconscious.

* * *

"STOP, THIEF!"

Judy and Nick turned their attention to the sidewalk.

An elderly ibex woman was yelling after an arctic fox who now had a purse in his clutches. The fox soon took off down a dark alley. This alley made a sharp left turn, so a quick turn by the cruiser would be impractical.

After reporting the purse-snatching to dispatch, Nick pulled the cruiser to a halt.

"You're a faster runner." he said, "You go after him. I'll cut him off on the other side!"

"Right!" Judy jumped out the passenger-side door.

She saw the fox round the sharp turn just as she was beginning to catch up. When Judy made the turn, however, the alley was deserted, save for a large pickup truck hitched to a large, white trailer with a large, horizontal door in the side. She banged her fist against the trailer door in frustration, and to her surprise, it rolled open. She peeked inside. It was a large, padded chamber; a large, _empty_ padded chamber. No sign of the purse-snatcher in _here_!

As she pulled her head out of this chamber, Judy felt a terrific pain on the back of her head, and she slumped to the ground, unconscious.

* * *

[[OST1]](https://youtu.be/AFGkaSEjGqk)

Judy now dreamt she was running through the wheat fields back in Bunnyburrow. It felt like she was playing tag with her siblings again.

That's what she thought anyway.

"Alphonse! _Heel!_ " came a girl's voice from Judy's right.

She glanced over and saw an odd, four-legged, wolf-like creature. It looked vaguely like what wolves had looked like pre-evolution, but its features were softer, and it looked a bit too small to be a wolf, and its fur was the wrong hue – more of a golden color. It walked up to a stunned Judy, gave her a slobbery lick, and then backed off a little.

Just then, another creature ran up, this time on two legs.

"Alphonse! Wait up!" came the girl's voice again.

It was an odd mammal with no hair on its face or arms. In fact, the only hair it had was the brown hair atop its head. It wore a sweater and jogging pants as it ambled up to the wolf-creature.

It walked up to the creature, panting from exertion, bent over to catch her breath, then stared at Judy in utter bewilderment.

* * *

Noa groaned as she woke from that bizarre dream. She remembered running with Alphonse I, then bumping into some anthropomorphic rabbit... _thing_.

She was surprised she'd collapsed like that. Surely she hadn't had _that_ much to drink! She groggily raised her body up off the pavement and glanced upward. Still nighttime. She couldn't have been out that long then.

She needed to get home, sleep this off. Lord knows what the others would think if she came to work with a hangover. She could practically hear Asuma now; _"How'd you get hammered like this?! I thought you practically grew up inhaling beer fumes!"_

She wearily scratched an itch. Then she realized something. She nervously looked over herself – she could have sworn she'd been in her civvies! Now she was in her police uniform – no, not _her_ police uniform! Not even a Japanese police uniform! It looked like the uniforms of American cops she'd seen on TV – sometimes she'd wondered about phoning up Kanuka and asking which uniform she'd preferred.

When she checked over her uniform, her heart sank as she realized that the uniform wasn't all that was wrong. Her hands were different. They were covered with grey fur – with white on the palm-side – and only had four fingers each.

She looked over and saw a puddle. Anxiously, Noa glanced at her reflection in the puddle. Immediately, she wished she hadn't.

Staring back at Noa – with a horrified look in its purple eyes – was some sort of grey-furred rabbit creature. It was all there; the giant, black-tipped ears erupting from its head, the little pink nose, and when she opened her mouth, there was a noticeable pair of buckteeth. No mistaking it. It was the rabbit-thing from her dream.

Noa did the only thing she could think of; she screamed.

* * *

When Judy came to, her first thought was that there were no stars in the night sky. No surprise there. In big cities like Zootopia, one seldom saw stars thanks to light pollution – not like out in Bunnyburrow.

Still, something seemed… _off_ about this sky…

Judy's thoughts turned to other matters. She got up on her feet, using the wall next to her for support, and tried to reach for her radio.

It was then that she realized that she wasn't in uniform. She was in a black hoodie and jeans. Had her attacker… changed her clothes?!

Wait, that wasn't all. Something else was wrong. However, before she could investigate further, a voice interrupted her thoughts.

"Wha? Izumi! You alright?"

Judy turned around and to her surprise, saw a male version of the odd mammal from her dream. Like the mammal from her dream, it had no hair on its face or hands; only the black hair atop its head. This mammal was dressed in a red jacket.

Judy had to admit she'd never seen a mammal like this before, but thousands of species – more than Judy could name – called Zootopia home. Sometimes it felt like she met a new one every couple weeks while on duty.

"Ugh, what time is it?" she groaned.

The hairless mammal checked his watch. "Just past 9:45. You've only been gone about an hour or so."

Judy soon realized that the densely packed, lower-slung houses did _not_ match Downtown Zootopia. Some of the denser regions of Savanna Central, Sahara Square, or the Meadowlands, maybe, but not Downtown.

"Where am I?"

The hairless mammal sighed. "You're only three blocks east of the cart. Honestly Noa, I didn't think you could get hammered like this! I thought you were practically raised on alcohol fumes! I guess even bartender's daughters have their limits!"

"What?!" said Judy, not understanding one word the mammal had said. What did he mean by a 'bartender's daughter'? And who was Noah?!

"Come on!" said the mammal, grabbing her by the hand, "Let's get you home and _hopefully_ Gotoh won't rake you over the coals _too_ much in the morning!"

At first, Judy figured that the mammal had recognized her from all the publicity she'd received during the Night Howler Incident. But then, she noticed something about her hand. She quickly pulled it back.

"Noa!" the mammal protested.

Judy stared at her hand in disbelief. It now had five fingers instead of four, had nails instead of short claws, and was devoid of fur. She checked her other hand – it was the same.

She quickly put her hands to her face. No muzzle, not even any fur except on the top of her head.

She looked in her pocket and pulled out a phone. In the reflection of the powered-off screen, she saw the female mammal from her dream.

Her shock allowed the groggy feeling to return, and Judy was out like a light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1]: HL-97 Bulldog - a construction Labor manufactured by Hishii Heavy Industries. They are considered among the most common Labors in operation.
> 
> [2]: Delia Jackson's surname is a reference to the fact that she is a white-tailed jackrabbit (Lepus townsendii). Iona Stoker is a spectral bat - or false vampire bat (Vampyrum spectrum). Her surname is a reference to Bram Stoker, the author of Dracula.
> 
> [OST1]: Kenji Kawai - ASAMOYA (soundtrack from Patlabor - the Mobile Police TV series)
> 
>  
> 
> So that's the beginning! The new one, anyway, for originally, I abruptly plopped the reader right into things with little explanation. Hopefully this new beginning chapter rectifies that little issue.


	2. Not My Bed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Judy and Noa get their first taste of each other's co-workers, and Judy finds that her skill set may not be ideal for her new situation.

Nick had just gotten out of the cruiser when he heard a familiar voice begin to scream. He immediately ran down the alley to the source of the scream and found Judy, fearfully backing against a wall, screaming her head off, staring at a puddle in the middle of the dark alley.

Nick's eyes bugged as he saw this. Judy could get emotional, sure, but she _never_ panicked _this_ badly – especially on duty! He ran to his partner's side. "Judy! Judy, what happened?!"

The rabbit turned to him, paused for a short while, then screamed even louder, trying to run.

Nick however, managed to grab her and pull her close.

"Judy! It's alright! It's me, Nick!" he protested as she tried to pull herself away from him.

"NO! NO! YOU'RE NOT- YOU CAN'T BE- I'M- Ughh…" the rabbit slumped over in his arms, unconscious.

Nick anxiously pulled out his radio. "Wilde to Dispatch. Officer down! Repeat! Officer down!"

* * *

For the second time, Judy had a rude awakening. That had to be the second-weirdest dream she'd ever had!

Now, she groggily rose out of bed.

"Rise and shine, Sleeping Beauty!" came a voice next to her.

Judy turned her head and saw another furless mammal like the one from last night. It was a young, black-haired female sitting next to her, a book in her lap.

Judy blinked. That _hadn't_ been a dream?!

Now Judy realized that her "bed" was more of a mattress on the floor.

"Asuma called me over and we took a cab back to your place. I told him I'd stay with you and make sure you got up for work today.

Judy glanced at her hands. "Five fingers…" she noted with dismay.

The woman sighed impatiently. "Yes, two hands, five fingers each. Two feet, five toes each, and one sloshed head! You officially have no right to say I can't hold my liquor when you get that drunk!"

"I-I wasn't drunk!" said Judy, not sure what else to say, then realizing that the voice she'd said that with was not one she recognized.

"So all those glasses were full of green apple juice then?!" quipped the woman, putting the book on the bedside table, "I'm going to get you some breakfast. You stay there."

This left Judy alone to feel her face once again. Hairless like before. The inside of her mouth had none of the traditional rabbit incisors. What had happened out there?!

Just then, the bedroom door opened and in came the black-haired woman, carrying a plate with some toast on it in one hand, and a glass of milk in the other.

"Your ladyship's breakfast." she teased.

"Thanks..." Judy nervously took the toast and began eating it. Eating with these new teeth felt awkward, but she quickly got used to chewing it.

"Finish up quick and get dressed." said the woman, "I'll drive you to SV2 once you're ready. I'll wait in the car."

SV2? What what that? Before Judy could ask, the woman fished out some clothes from a nearby dresser, tossing them onto the bed.

Judy was soon left alone. Her attention wandered to the model robot on the shelf next to her. It was white, with black accents on its feet and chest. A shield was on its left arm, a revolver in its right. Its head had no proper 'face' – just a mouthplate and a green visor. A fin jutted out of the left-hand side of its head, with a set of antenna jutting out of the right-hand side. Atop either shoulder was an emergency vehicle-style lightbar. Amusingly enough, Judy noticed that it had a license plate on its abdomen.

It was standing atop a little platform with a small plaque on it:

**SHINOHARA HEAVY INDUSTRIES**  
**[AV-98 INGRAM](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/av-98.htm) **  
**Police Patrol Labor** **[1]**

Judy pondered the meaning of 'Patrol Labor' for a second, then noticed that the orange vest that Kumagami had given her as part of her clothes featured a badge-like insignia. Then she looked at the model, realizing the significance of the lightbars on the Ingram's shoulders and the similarly badge-like insignia on its chest.

The gears began to turn in Judy's mind. Was this other mammal a cop? Was the robot a police robot of some sort?!

Her breakfast finished, Judy put on the uniform and caught a glimpse of herself in a mirror as she left the apartment. With its bright orange vest, this new uniform resembled the uniform she'd worn when on parking duty, but without the hat. She liked her ZPD blue uniform better.

Will I ever wear it again? Judy wondered, thinking of good times she'd had with Clawhauser, Fangmeyer, Wolfard, McHorn, Francine, and…

…Nick…!

Judy shook the thought out of her head. She had to _focus_!

She stepped out of the apartment, rejoining the black-haired woman and getting into her compact car. Might as well play along until she had some idea of what was going on.

As the car trundled on, Judy was surprised at how uniformly scaled everything was - not to mention that these almost-hairless mammals seemed to be the only mammals on the streets. She'd heard of locales that were predominantly one species - in fact, her hometown of Bunnyburrow was one of them - but this place seemed too dense and urban to be one of them.

Suddenly, Judy caught a glimpse of a male hairless mammal walking down the street holding a leather cord with a wolf-creature on the other end. But this wolf-creature was different from the one in her dream. It was black-furred, with floppy ears, and also looked a bit larger.

"What's that?" she muttered.

"What's what?" said the woman, causing Judy to look back at her. Judy thought about pointing the wolf-creature out, but by this point, the car had left it far behind.

"Um... never mind."

The car seemed to continue getting closer to the sea until it went through a gate, across a short bridge, and onto a small island that was empty, save for a large, warehouse-like building that had a tall, steel truss tower poking up from it. The car pulled into a small parking lot next to the warehouse, and began to circle around the building, to where a pair of gigantic doors had been opened.

As the two women got out of the car, Judy noticed a lot of hairless mammals in identical white, oil-stained uniforms were milling about the place.

The two women rounded the corner into the warehouse. Inside were more white-uniformed hairless mammals, but what caught Judy's eye were the two giant, white machines on the right-hand wall.

There was no mistaking them; they looked exactly like the model in the apartment. One of them had a different head with a bigger visor that made it look like a cross between a football helmet and a motorcycle helmet, but that was the only real difference.

The sheer scale of these robots caught Judy flat-pawed. That model hadn't done them justice! Judy's sense of scale had already been thrown awry by the uniform scale of this bizarre place, so seeing these massive machines, bigger even than elephants in her world, just floored her.

Judy noticed that they had numbers on their left shoulders. The one with the model's visor had a number 1. The one with the bigger visor had a number 2. Looking up, she noticed some lettering on the left-hand side of the upper torso of Ingram #1: "ALPHONSE."

Judy tilted her head at that. Calling a giant robot "Alphonse" sounded like something her mother would do.

"Izumi!" said the black-haired woman, halfway up a flight of stairs leading to some sort of upper level, "You coming or what?"

"Coming!" Judy ran after the woman, heading up the stairs, then into some sort of duty room filled with desks, a microwave, and a pathetically old TV set. In it, a few more hairless mammals were already seated.

Judy recognized the black-haired male from the alley straight away. He was propped back in a chair, leaning so that the front legs of the chair lifted off the floor. His head was tilted back as he studied the ceiling. What was he called? Asuma or something like that?

Also in the room was a thickly built, well-tanned, black-haired male with a very pronounced jaw. His impatient gaze seemed to bore a hole in the wall as he sat in his chair, his arms crossed.

Judy's eyes shifted to the other side of the room.

Sitting together were two males playing a card game. One was a huge, black-haired man with a stoic expression who reminded Judy a little of Chief Bogo with his imposing physique. His partner was shorter, with mouse-brown hair and glasses.

" _Sake_ finally got to ya, huh?" said the black-haired one.

"Looks like it..." said the black-haired woman, turning back to Noa, "I'm going to change into my uniform. Why don't you get some water or something?"

Judy just chuckled nervously and sat down in one of the free desks. She still had _no_ idea what was going on.

"Um, Izumi?"

Judy turned around and noticed the enormous form of the stoic-faced, black-haired tall mammal.

"You're awfully quiet." the tall one remarked in a deep voice, "Is everything alright?"

"Alright?" sputtered Judy, "Yeah! Uh… Everything's fine!"

Yamasaki wasn't convinced. "Was it about last night?"

It occurred to Judy that the big one must have been told about Asuma carrying Judy to her apartment. "Oh, that! Well, it's all good! Just a bit too much to drink!"

"Okay…" the tall one murmured, "It's just that when we go out drinking, you're usually bright-eyed and bushy-tailed the next morning compared to the rest of us."

Drat. Judy had forgotten Asuma's remark that "Izumi" was a barkeeper's daughter and that she was 'practically raised on alcohol fumes'. This weird mammal must really be able to hold her liquor…

Wait a minute…!

"What do you mean, 'bushy-tailed'?!" The tall one didn't know anything about Judy's predicament, did he?!

The hulking mammal seemed taken aback by Judy's outburst. "It's just an expression…"

Judy softened. Maybe it _was_ just an expression... Better not attract any more suspicion. Play it cool. Maybe make a joke out of it? "I'm not a fox or a squirrel or anything…".

"You're not coming down with something, are you?" said the tall one, his eyebrows rising with genuine concern.

"Just leave it, Yamazaki!" huffed the big-chinned one, not deigning to make eye contact with any of the others, "If anything, yesterday proves she's a mere mortal like the rest of us!"

"Jealous, are we?" said Asuma, giving a toothy grin.

Judy was surprised at how easily Asuma had bared his teeth. One rarely saw predators do that unless it was in a malicious spirit. Maybe these hairless mammals were prey species?

'Big Chin' bristled at Asuma's remark. "What happened last night shows I have nothing to be jealous _about_! And even if she holds her liquor better than me, I've got bigger numbers than her in other areas!"

"Like in money the city owes bystanders after you deploy?" sniped Asuma.

"Ouch…" muttered the glasses-wearing mammal.

Big Chin's face had turned beet red. Judy wondered if that's what angry furred mammals looked like if their fur were shaved off.

Big Chin now advanced on Asuma. Now Judy began to worry if she'd have to intervene in a workplace brawl. "Now listen here, Shinohara! _I-!_ "

Suddenly, alarm bells began to ring all over the building.

* * *

Noa gradually came to, hoping that what she saw had been a particularly freaky dream. She didn't dare open her eyes.

She did hear voices though. One deep, growling, and commanding, the other young and virile.

"We thought she'd been shot! Or stabbed!" growled the deep voice, clearly not happy.

"Well, what was I supposed to do?!" said the young voice, "Say 'Officer fainted! Officer fainted!'?!"

"It seemed like she had come to when you saw her."

"Yeah, but this is Judy we're talking about! She can take down a rhino without breaking a sweat! I've only been on the force for a short while, but I know that she _never_ panics! If something could get her that afraid…!"

Noa opened her eyes.

"Judy!" the young voice came again.

The first thing Noa saw was a wet, doglike nose close to her face.

"Alright, Alphonse…" Noa groaned drearily, pushing the dog's muzzle away, "I'll feed you. Just gimme a sec…"

"Watch it!" came the young voice, closer this time, "And who's Alphonse?"

Noa's vision cleared, and she realized that the muzzle she'd pushed away hadn't belonged to her late dog, but to what looked unmistakably like the russet-furred anthropomorphic fox creature that had grabbed her in the alley. Behind him, was the imposing form of what looked like a black-furred, minotaur-like creature with large, curved horns. On the other side of the bed was some tapir-like creature in a lab coat.

The fox and minotaur seemed to be wearing some kind of American-style police uniform and looked concerned – the fox especially.

Noa backed up against the head of the bed – wait, when had she managed to get into bed?! Now it looked like she was in a hospital of some sort.

"Take it easy, Carrots!" said the fox, holding Noa's hand, which to Noa's dismay, was still paw-shaped, "I'm not Frankenstoat's monster!"

"What's going on?!" Noa squeaked – in a voice that she didn't recognize.

The minotaur-man sighed. "We were hoping you could tell _us_ , Hopps. You and Wilde were pursuing a robbery suspect on your beat and you went off on your own."

"Don't you remember?" said the fox, "That purse-snatching arctic fox? You ran after him while I took the car and cut him off?"

"I-I don't remember anything…" said Noa, pulling the blanket over her head, feeling a bit uncomfortable about accommodating her now-oversized ears. "I don't even _know_ you! G-Go away!"

* * *

"Judy…!" said Nick, reaching to pull the blanket away. The doctor grabbed his paw before he could do that.

"It'd be best not to force her." said the doctor, "It's quite obvious that she's been through some sort of shock."

"Any idea what happened, Doctor Tapper?" said ZPD Chief Adrian Bogo.

"I'm grasping at straws here," said the tapir, shrugging, "but if I had to guess, I'd say post-traumatic amnesia stemming from that bump on the head."

"Any idea how she came by that?" said Bogo.

"Well, she could have been struck from behind, or she may have fallen backwards and hit the back of her head as she fell. Unless her memory returns, we may never know for sure."

Dr. Tapper glanced back at his hiding patient. "I think that it might be wise to leave her be for now. Friends or not, she may be intimidated by this crowd."

"But you can fix her, right doc?" said Nick.

"Well, moderate cases of PTA make full recoveries more often than not. I'd have to see how soon her memory returns – if at all – to judge if there's any permanent damage though."

"Permanent damage?!"

"Let the doctor worry about that, Wilde." said Bogo, putting a comforting – and restraining – hoof on Nick's shoulder. "We'll just leave Hopps to recover in her own time."

Bogo left the hospital ward, followed by a reluctant Nick Wilde.

* * *

**[[OST1]](https://youtu.be/SPGxM7705aU) **

_"Now hear this! Now hear this!"_ came a disturbingly calm voice over what Judy assumed was a Public Address System, _"Division 1 is requesting backup at Odaiba. Division 2 is to scramble immediately. I repeat, Division 1 requesting backup at Odaiba. Division 2 to scramble immediately."_

The bespectacled mammal groaned as he got out of his chair. "No rest for the wicked, then..."

Everyone began making their way out the duty room door.

"What's going on?!" asked Judy, nervous as to what was going on.

"We're on deck, that's what!" said Asuma, tossing something at Judy. She caught it easily and looked it over. It was some sort of crash helmet. It was white, with a police badge on the forehead portion, but leaving the front part of the top of the head exposed.

"What-"

"No time for hangovers! _Come on!_ " Asuma grabbed Judy by the arm and dragged her down the stairs to the feet of one of the giant robots - the one marked "ALPHONSE," then gestured up the ladder that led to a platform that allowed access to the machine's open chest cavity, where a seat was visible inside

Judy's face grew panicked as she realized what they wanted her to do. They wanted her to drive the robot.

Alright, deep breaths, Judy. You can do this. Whatever you are, you're no quitter!

The former rabbit climbed up the ladder, and made her way into the cockpit, looking at the scene in front of the robot. Two massive trucks had been positioned across the warehouse from her. They had payload bays that tilted up 90 degrees. Judy was watching the other machine – the one with number two on its left shoulder – backing into the truck, allowing clamps on the payload bay to secure it in place.

Judy began to understand what was happening. These trucks were how the giant robots would be transported to wherever they were going, so Judy wouldn't have to operate this one for that long – but that still left her with the dilemma of how to operate it for any length of time.

"Noa! What's taking you?!" said Asuma voice from below.

"Just gimme a second!" Judy said.

"Hey, Shinohara!" said one of the white-uniformed mammals – one with dark brown hair and glasses.

"What?!"

"Come with me a sec!" the white uniformed mammal dragged Asuma away. Good thing, too. It allowed Judy to look around the cockpit uninterrupted.

There were monitors on either side, as well as extra ones that looked like they would slide in front of her when the cockpit was closed (how do you close the cockpit?). A harness like the kind you saw on roller coasters now held her in place. On the armrests of her seat were multiple levers (what did they all do?). Pedals lay at her feet (did they operate like a car? did they control just the legs?)

Whatever was going on, Judy was not prepared for this.

Why was Judy in this weird mammal's body?!

Why was this weird mammal piloting a giant police robot?!

Why would you need a giant police robot?!

What kind of crazy world was this?! What was she supposed to do?!

And why, why, _why_ would you name a giant police robot "Alphonse"?!

 _{Somebody help me!}_ Judy found herself screaming in her head.

* * *

Noa nervously pulled her head out from under the covers. The tapir-doctor and the other animal people had left earlier. She was alone behind the curtains in the hospital ward; just her and this weird bunny body she hadn't asked for.

She looked over her hands again. They had short little claws – not very large ones though.

She then pulled the covers off her to look at her legs. Her hips and thighs were huge – and her legs looked longer. At the end of her legs, a pair of rabbit's feet greeted her. She pulled up one of them to examine it. No paw-pads on the underside.

Noa glanced around nervously, and then pulled herself into a fetal position.

What was she doing in this weird animal world?!

Why had she been turned into a rabbit?!

What other species were there?!

What was her name now? Judy? Hopps? Carrots?!

How was she supposed to get back to her original body?!

 _Could_ she even get back to her original body?!

What was she supposed to do now?!

_{I wish I'd wake up from this! I just wanna go home! I don't care if Asuma laughs at me for being hung over! I just wanna go home! Somebody help me!}_

* * *

_{Somebody help me!}_

Judy gaped. Thoughts didn't echo! "Who said that?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1]: AV-98 Ingram - Law enforcement patrol labor manufactured by Shinohara Heavy Industries. Height: 8.02 metres. Weight: 6.0 metric tons (6.62 metric tons when fully equipped). Equipped with a 37mm revolver cannon (loads 6 rounds) stored in the right leg, and an anti-Labor stun stick stored under a shield mounted on the left forearm.
> 
> [OST1]: Kenji Kawai - "Order for a Sally" (from the OST for Patlabor: The Movie)


	3. Not My Team

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noa and Judy have established contact - and about time, too, 'cause now Judy has to:
> 
> 1) Figure out how to operate a giant robot
> 
> and 2) Navigate the madness that is SV2 Division 2.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo! This one's a doozy! Didn't mean for it to be so long, but I couldn't think of a better cutoff point for this revised version of Chapter 3.

_{Who said that?!}_ came a voice that seemed to go directly into Noa's mind.

Noa bolted upright in bed, and looked around her. No one tried to come through the curtains. Was that _really_ in her mind?

 _{Is someone there?!}_ came the voice again.

* * *

Judy's attempt at reaching out to the voice felt foolhardy at first, but it soon paid off.

 _{…Hello? Who is this?}_ came a nervous voice.

_{I'm Judy Hopps. Who is this?}_

* * *

Judy… Hopps…? The fox and the minotaur had called Noa 'Judy' and 'Hopps' respectively.

 _{What are you?}_ she asked. She'd heard old folklore about mystical creatures able to gain power over you if you gave them your name. Noa wasn't superstitious, but given what had happened to her, she wasn't taking any chances.

* * *

_{What are you?}_ said the voice.

Judy gave a start at this. That wasn't the response she'd expected. She looked over her unfamiliar body.

_{I… I don't know…}_

* * *

_{You don't know?! Whaddya mean, you don't know?!}_ thought Noa, getting annoyed, _{Are you an animal?! A vegetable?! A mineral?! You gotta have_ some _idea of what you are!}_

There was a pregnant pause before the other voice spoke up again. _{Well, I'm a mammal, either way…}_

Noa sighed. _{Well, that's a start…}_

Just then, a thought occurred to Noa. _{Are you… a rabbit?}_

* * *

Judy gaped. _{I-I_ thought _I was!}_

_{You-you wouldn't by any chance be in a human body right now?}_

_{Human?}_ What on earth was a human?!

 _{Are you… Are you a hairless monkey right now?}_ the other voice pressed on.

Monkey? _{Not_ completely _hairless… I've got hair up top, but that's about it.}_

 _{Have people…}_ the other mental voice paused for a while, _{Have people called you 'Noa Izumi' recently?}_

Judy began to realize what the other voice was getting at.

* * *

_{Is that your name?}_ asked the other voice, _{Are you Noa Izumi?}_

Noa felt her ears rise high above her head. To hell with traditional Japanese demons! She needed to know if her idea was right!

 _{YES, YES, YES!}_ she thought before realizing she was speaking aloud as well, _{I'm Noa Izumi!}_

 _{Then are you… stuck… in a rabbit's body?}_ the voice asked again.

_{YES! I'M STUCK! YOU'VE GOTTA HELP ME!}_

* * *

_{Okay, okay!}_ thought Judy. Noa Izumi's voice was giving her a headache. Was it possible for telepaths to give each other migraines by mentally shouting? _{I don't know if I can help you, but I think we've switched bodies…}_

 _{That's what_ I _figured!}_ thought Noa.

_{Where are you- I mean, where is my body?}_

_{In a hospital of some sort. The doctor was talking about post-traumatic amnesia for a while. I'm alone now… Where are you- I mean, me- I mean-?}_

_{I_ know _what you mean!}_ said Judy, _{Right now, I think_ I _need_ your _help! I've been dragged into some kind of warehouse and they want me-er,_ you _to pilot a giant robot!}_

* * *

"WHAT?!"

Noa closed her mouth and looked around. Nobody seemed to have heard her. _{You've been ordered to deploy in Alphonse- er, Unit 1?!}_

_{Yeah…}_

_{Can't you find a way out of it?!}_

_{I can't! They're getting impatient down there!}_

_{Are you still in the maintenance bay?}_

_{Uh…}_

_{Is Unit 1 standing against the wall of the SV2 building or is he in the carrier's payload bay?}_

* * *

Judy wasn't sure if she should be tense or calm. _{Um, maintenance bay, I'm guessing?}_

_{Okay… Have you booted up the system yet?}_

_{The what?}_

_{The Ingram's OS!}_

Judy glanced around the cockpit, eyes settling on the console in front of her.

_{OS? Like with computers?}_

_{_ Yes _! Were born in a barn?! Now is the cockpit open or closed?}_

_{Open! And I resent that remark!}_

_{Okay, you'll want to close it before you do anything else. Pull the blue lever on your right-hand side.}_

_{Right…}_ Judy complied. The machine's cockpit door swung closed, and the front monitors swung into place in front of her. _{Now what?}_

_{Now hit the main computer power button. It should be near the right side of the keyboard in front of you.}_

Judy found the power button easily. It had the universal "circle and line" associated with on/off switches. The screen flickered to life, and a logo appeared – an "H" with an "S" superimposed over it. The words "Shinohara Heavy Industry Co." were underneath this logo.

However, the logo soon disappeared, followed by a blinking image of a folder with a question mark, above the words "FILE NOT AVAILABLE."

"Huh?!" Judy gave a start. _{Noa, it's telling me 'File not available'!}_

 _{What?!_ That _shouldn't happen!}_

"A-HEM!"

It turned out that the robot had a second cockpit hatch located above Judy's head. Through it, she saw Asuma, glaring daggers at her.

"Aren't we _forgetting something?!_ " he snapped, thrusting a computer disc in its case in front of Judy's face. **[** **1]** Judy caught the disc's label:

**SV2-2  
** **Unit 1 Mvt. Data**

* * *

_{Noa, someone just shoved a disc in front of me. It says 'Mvt. Data'.}_

" _WHAT?!_ " Noa squeaked, before realizing she'd said that out loud. She soon found herself pulling on her extra-long ears in frustration. _{You forgot the movement disc?! How the hell do you forget the movement disc?! You might as well have forgotten your head, nimrod!}_

* * *

_{Well_ excuse me _for having never even_ seen _a giant robot before!}_ Judy grumbled, taking the disc and turning it over, _{What_ is _the movement disc, anyway?}_

 _{It contains the accumulated movement data from Alphonse's previous deployments!}_ snapped Noa, _{Without a movement disc, he can't twiddle his thumbs, let alone fight! It's practically his brain!}_

Judy chuckled nervously at Asuma as she inserted the disc into a slot in the console in front of her.

The monitors then came alive with visuals of the hangar around the robot. It wasn't a perfect look, but it was enough to give Judy an idea of what was going on.

 _{Okay, Noa.}_ she said into their link, _{I_ think _I've got it fired up. I can't pretend I know what I'm doing, so I'm gonna need your help every step of the way, but I'm sure we can make a_ great _team if we just-}_

Just then, the same unnervingly calm voice broke out over the PA system a second time.

" _Um, sorry about this. Division 1 have just informed us that they will_ not _be needing our assistance after all. Captain Nagumo says that both of the renegade Labors in question have been disabled and the perpetrators are now in police custody. Sorry to get you all excited! As you were!"_

_[[OST1]](https://youtu.be/KOjhQ7zfd1o) _

"WHAT?!" Judy and Asuma chorused, the latter pulling his head out of the upper hatch.

" _GLORY-HOGS!_ " roared Big Chin's voice.

* * *

_{What's going on?!}_ thought Noa. If that dumb bunny had so much as _scratched_ her Labor…!

If Judy had never seen a Labor before, Noa figured that she must be some sort of country bumpkin or hillbilly. Noa did _not_ want someone that green going out in her Alphonse!

Judy's voice finally piped up. _{Um… It turns out it was a false alarm. I won't be going out there!}_

"Whaaa…?" said Noa. She then shook her head in aggravation. Just another day at Special Vehicles Second Section! At least this way, she wouldn't have to worry about teaching a complete novice how to pilot a six-ton Labor right in the middle of a deployment!

* * *

_{I have to admit, I did_ not _see this coming…}_ said Judy. She was actually beginning to like the idea of piloting a giant robot.

"Dammit, Captain…" groaned Asuma as he pushed himself off the machine and back onto the platform. Judy opened the cockpit's front hatch and joined him.

 _{So… what now?}_ she asked Noa.

 _{Now… that's a good question…}_ replied Noa

" _Now_ , I'm gonna drown my frustration in tea!" grumbled Asuma as Judy realized she'd asked that out loud as well.

"Amen to that…!" grumbled the black-haired woman, who was now in an orange vest like the others.

As Ingram #2 made its way back into its maintenance berth, Judy caught Asuma, Black-Haired Girl, and Tall Guy ambling their way back into the duty room.

Judy just sat down in a chair, drumming her fingers on the desk.

 _{I'm guessing, since we're stuck like this, we might as well get to know each other.}_ said Judy, grinning as she tried to adopt a positive attitude, _{Like I said, I'm Judy Hopps. I'm an Officer with Precinct 1 of the Zootopia Police Department, and I'm normally a rabbit!}_

Noa took her time responding. _{I-I'm Noa Izumi. I'm supposed to be human. I'm an Officer in the Tokyo Metro Police… I work in Special Vehicles, Second Section, Division 2.}_

 _{Special vehicles?}_ Now that was _one_ way to look at giant robots… _{They were talking about a Division 1. Do they use giant robots, too?}_

_{Yeah, and they're called Patlabors by the way.}_

_{Patlabors?}_

_{It's short for 'Patrol Labor'.}_

That still left a lot of questions unanswered. _{Look Noa. I've got a lot of questions about your life, and I imagine you've got a lot about mine. Tell you what; you ask me a question about life over there, then I ask you about life over here, then back to you, back to me, and so on – like tennis!}_

* * *

_{Oh… uh…}_

_{What's wrong?}_ came Judy's voice, _{Don't you have tennis over here?}_

 _{No, no! We do! I can't play worth a damn though.}_ Noa stroked the back of her head, feeling along her drooped ears. _{I guess, my first question, is… are there any humans in your world?}_

* * *

Judy tensed up. She hadn't prepared herself for that possibility. Up until now, she'd kept telling herself that 'humans' were a rare species of mammal from her 'world' that she hadn't known about until now. If Noa really _was_ in a different 'world'…

_{I… hadn't known about them at all until I saw them last night. Why d'you ask?"_

_{Well, there aren't any animals like you where I'm from.}_

Judy paused again.

 _{I mean, you see rabbits, foxes, bulls and whatnot in this world,}_ clarified Noa, _{but they walk on four legs, and they certainly don't talk or wear clothes or anything like that…}_

Judy's heart sank as she recalled the four-legged wolf-like creature from her dream. If she really had switched bodies with an alien mammal from an alternate dimension or something like that, then she stood little chance of fixing this.

 _{Is something wrong?}_ asked Noa.

 _{It's fine…}_ Judy's eyes fell on one of the windows, which faced the sea, where a container ship was passing in the distance. Tokyo must be a major port. Now, Judy knew her first question for Noa. _{Noa. What happened just before you got switched with me?}_

* * *

Noa's ears perked with alertness. That was pretty abrupt! Then again, it made sense to get the heavy stuff out of the way first, and she'd started off with a big question of her own. _{I'll tell you, but my next question will be what happened to_ you _.}_

_{Fair enough.}_

Noa then told Judy about her night out drinking with the rest of Division 2 and how she tumbled into the trailer.

 _{Next thing I knew, I was in that alleyway as a rabbit girl.}_ explained Noa. _{I don't know_ what _that trailer was, but now that I think about it, I think it had something to do with what happened!}_

 _{Hmmmm…}_ Judy wondered, _{could you describe this trailer in more detail?}_

_{It was big – like two-and-a-half meters tall, and painted white with a black base. I didn't see if there was any writing on it or anything. The door was a roll-up door.}_

_{I think I may have seen that exact same trailer!}_ Judy remarked, _{My partner and I were on our beat one night – we don't usually go on night shift, but orders were orders… Anyway, we were watching the streets and we spotted a robbery in progress…}_

Judy then filled Noa in on the rest of her story, up until the pain in her head.

 _{Makes sense…}_ said Noa, _{The doctor here_ said _you'd taken a blow to the back of the head! Someone must've conked you from behind!}_

 _{Yes!}_ said Judy, _{Now I'm thinking, whoever knocked me out must have put me in that trailer. Our bodies must have been switched when I was in that one and you were in the other one!}_

 _{But how'd the guy with your trailer know I was in the other one?}_ asked Noa, _{And how did we get out? And more importantly,_ why _would they do this?! Why switch the brains of two random cops?! I mean, I wasn't even in uniform!}_

 _{I don't know…}_ said Judy, _{But now that we know how we came to be like this, we now know where to go from here on out!}_

_{We do?}_

_{Yeah! Our first order of business is finding out where those trailers are!}_

_{Okay! Now how do we do that?}_

_{…!}_

_{You don't know, do you?}_

* * *

_{Okay…}_ said Judy, nervously smiling as her eyes wandered around the breakroom, _{Finding the trailers is our_ second _order of business. Our_ real _first order of business is figuring out how to keep a low profile without your friends and/or my friends thinking we've gone insane!}_

Noa wasn't letting up. _{And how do we do_ that _?}_

Judy sighed. _{Well, for starters, I'll need to know who your co-workers are. I'll make that my next serve in my question tennis.}_

_{Okay…}_

Judy glanced over at Asuma, who was guzzling down hot tea in annoyance. _{For starters, how about the black-haired one? Asuma… Shinoharea? Something like that?}_

 _{Shino_ hara _,}_ corrected Noa, _{Asuma Shinohara. He's my backup.}_

_{Backup?}_

Noa explained further. "Backups" assisted Patlabor pilots (or "Forwards" as they were known) by advising them, giving them info on the situation, and covering for the Patlabor's blind spots. They drove specially armored police cars called "command cars."

Judy smiled as she imagined Nick quipping at her from a command car while she operated a Labor. _{So… Asuma's your partner, right?}_

* * *

Noa gave a start at that. Judy wasn't _wrong_ , but Noa had never thought of it in that light before…

Obviously Judy wasn't a Patlabor pilot, so she must have been a regular cop. She'd have to ask the rabbit more about what she did in her line of work, and what having a partner there was like.

* * *

Judy heard grumbling coming from behind her and saw Big Chin and Spectacles coming into the room.

"I swear!" growled Big Chin, "It's like Division 1's doing this on purpose! Them and their fancy-pants [Peacemakers](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/av-0.htm)!" **[2]**

"It was bound to happen sooner or later." said Asuma, leaning back in his chair with his hands clasped behind his head, "Before the Peacemakers came in, _they_ were the ones stuck with the old [Pythons](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/mpl-97s.htm), and before _that_ , _we_ were saddled with that relic of a [Taisyo](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/asuka-mpl-96.htm)! It's one-upmanship, really!" **[3 & 4]**

Spectacles shuddered. "Can't say I miss the Taisyo. That Labor was a _wreck_!"

… _and I have_ no _idea what in Inlé they're talking about…_ Judy thought.

"So does this mean _we're_ next in line for the new generation of Patlabors?!" Big Chin now adopted a grin that Judy had heretofore only seen on Clawhauser when he'd been told Gazelle was going to host a charity performance for the ZPD, "Oh, man! Could they make a revolver cannon _bigger_ than a 44 mil?! That'd be so… so…"

"…So _irresponsible_ of _anyone_ to let you pull the trigger of a weapon like that!" quipped Asuma, who then gave his 'teeth-bared' grin again, "Admit it! You just want to shoot off bigger guns than Division 1!"

"O-of course not!" snapped Big Chin, "My interest is purely as an officer of the law! You'd never understand!"

"Riiiiiight…" said Asuma, who then turned to Judy, "You're awfully quiet, Noa…"

"Huh?" Judy didn't know what to say to that.

"This is the future of SV2 we're talking about here!" said Asuma, leaning in toward Judy, "I thought you'd be _livid_ at the thought of Alphonse getting traded in for a newer model?!"

"Uh…"

 _{What's going on?}_ asked Noa.

 _{They're talking about Patlabors!}_ said Judy, _{They want to know what you'd think if yours got replaced with a newer model!}_

_{What?!}_

_{Yeah, I think they're talking about what would happen if they made a new kind of Patlabor and you had to drive it.}_

_{What would I think?!}_ came Noa's voice, seething with fury, _{They. Want to know. What. I. THINK?!}_

* * *

Noa seemed eerily quiet for a second. Asuma was about to ask what was wrong when she began spluttering out her next sentence, as if she were awkwardly reading dialogue from a script.

"I… I think… uh… the Pacemaker – _Peacemaker! –_ doesn't have half the heart that Alphonse does…" Noa paused, then seemed to at least _try_ to put a little more oomph into her reply, "I don't care what all those sales pitches say. As far as I'm concerned, my Ingot – _Ingram_! – is where it's at in Labor technology! They can economize it, dress it up, dip it in chocolate or whatever, but it won't ever come close to what Alphonse can do! If you ask me, they can take their nutso OSes, funky subroutines, and all those other bells and whistles and blow it out their-"

Noa's face paled as she covered her mouth, as if utterly horrified by something she'd said. " _Sweet cheese and crackers!_ "

* * *

Judy had stopped relaying Noa's tirade, but the ex-human on the other end of their mental link kept on going, using language that would probably make every sidewalk in Zootopia spontaneously combust.

 _{Noa! NOA! Calm down!}_  Judy urged, _{I think they get the point!}_

* * *

_{…AND THEY'LL BE ABLE TO SEE THE CRATER FROM SPACE!}_ Noa finished, falling back onto her pillow, panting in exhaustion.

* * *

Judy now glanced around at Noa's co-workers, who were now all staring at her.

"…So you don't approve, then?" said Asuma.

"Nope! No approval coming from this girl!" said Judy nervously, emphatically shaking her head and waving her hands in front of her, "I disapprove _so_ hard you can see the crater from space!"

"Okay…?" said Asuma.

"E-excuse me!" Judy murmured, making her way out of the duty room.

* * *

"What's with _her_?!" said Kumagami, mulling over Noa's unusual behavior.

"Must still be some _saké_ in her system…" said Ohta.

"She _was_ taking her time getting Unit 1 moving back there…" murmured Mikiyasu Shinshi.

"Then again, she _did_ seem kind of out of it _before_ she was drinking…" said Asuma, "Back at the bar, she was worried her piloting ability was failing her."

"You don't think it's the Centipede's Dilemma, do you?" said Hiromi, rubbing his chin in thought

"Centipede's Dilemma?!" said Ohta, incredulous

"It's an old poem." the hulking carrier-driver sat down as he explained, "It goes like this;

 _'A centipede was happy - quite!_  
_Until a toad in fun_  
_Said, "Pray, which leg moves after which?"_  
_This raised her doubts to such a pitch_  
_She fell exhausted in the ditch_  
_Not knowing how to run.'"_

"Wait a minute!" said Asuma, "Are you saying Noa's performance is taking a dive because she's trying too hard?"

"I don't know, really." said Hiromi, "We could just be making a fuss over nothing."

"You're _all_ making a fuss over nothing!" said Ohta, shaking his head dismissively, "I think Izumi's just losing her touch because she's past her prime!"

"Bonehead!" quipped Asuma, "If that were the case, then you've already lost _your_ touch!"

"Whaddya mean?!" Ohta roared.

Asuma was unfazed. "You're older than she is!"

A myriad of expressions soon flowed across Ohta's face. First, his face reddened in rage as he took in a breath, then his brows rose in confusion, then his jaw dropped in shock, then his teeth clenched in utter horror.

"Uh… Wh-What I mean to say is, that…" Ohta said at last, standing to attention, "If this division is to keep its morale up, then it's imperative that we figure out how best to support our dear comrade-in-arms through this hard time!"

"Okay…" said Kumagami, "So how do we do that?"

"Hmmm…"

As the rest of Division 2 sat around their desks in contemplation, they remained unaware that the subject of their contention was staring at them through the window to the hangar.

* * *

With her weaker human ears, Judy hadn't been able to hear the subject of Division 2's intense discussion, but being able to see all the humans in one place without being interrupted gave her an opportunity to get Noa to finish introducing her to the rest of her fellow officers.

'Big Chin' was Isao Ohta, the pilot of Patlabor Unit 2. Judy needed no further explanation as to Ohta's character because what little she'd seen of him had been enough to establish that Ohta was a pompous gun nut with a reckless streak a mile wide.

'Tall Guy' was Hiromi Yamazaki, who drove Unit 1's Labor-Carrier truck. Noa had been quite adamant that Hiromi _{may look scary, but he's really a big softie.}_

'Spectacles' was Mikyasu Shinshi, driver of Unit 2's Carrier and the only married member of Division 2. Noa had said that Shinshi was a quiet person most of the time, but he could get "weird" at times – _{especially if you badmouth his wife!}_

Finally, rounding out the humans in the Duty Room was the black-haired female human, Lieutenant Takeo Kumagami; Ohta's Backup and Division 2's second-in-command. According to Noa, Kumagami was some sort of hotshot cop with a bunch of experience abroad and she'd whoop your butt in Judo. This made Judy curious as to how she'd fare against Kumagami in the ring.

_{Your co-workers are… an interesting bunch...}_

_{Yeah. We've got a bit of a bad rep…}_

_{Don't tell me - because of Ohta.}_

_{Yep.}_

The only member of Division 2 that Judy had not met yet was Kiichi Gotoh, Captain of Division 2.

 _{What's he like?}_ Judy asked.

 _{Well, he's… an odd one.}_ Noa remarked, _{You can never predict what he's going to do…}_

_{Is he strict?}_

_{Strict, no… More like… tricky…?}_

_{'Tricky'?}_

_{Well, wait until you see him. You'll know what I mean.}_

Judy's attention wandered off the window to the many white-uniformed humans milling around the hangar. She asked Noa who they all were.

 _{Oh, they're mechanics tending to the Labors. You don't have to know all their names. I can hardly keep them all straight anyway. You only_ really _need to know Chief Mechanic Sakaki and Shige, his #2.}_

* * *

At that moment, the tapir-doctor came back in through the curtain.

"Officer Hopps?" he said in a pleasant voice, "I'm Doctor Tapper. I'm sorry for the way you awoke earlier. I'm just going to ask you a few basic questions to see if your memory's come back."

 _{Judy, the doctor's back!}_ said Noa, _{He's gonna ask me questions about you! I'll need some answers!}_

And so, the tapir asked Noa questions, which she repeated to Judy over their mental link. Judy then gave Noa the answers, which she then repeated to Doctor Tapper.

"What is your full name?"

"Judith Laverne Hopps."

"What are your parents' names?"

"Stuart and Bonnie Hopps."

The questions went on to discuss other aspects of Judy's life, and also the events leading up to her getting knocked out. Noa decided to repeat Judy's story of what had happened, up until the pain on her head.

By the time this had finished, Dr. Tapper looked perplexed, but seemed to accept that everything was all right with "Judy's" memory. He left the ward, only returning after three quarters of an hour.

"I was just on the phone with your Chief." he said, "This is all highly irregular, but given how you've reacted to my questions, I think you're on the mend at the very least. Nonetheless, Chief Bogo was very insistent that you have adequate time to rest and recuperate. To that end, he is giving you five days administrative leave, and he wants you checked up at least once within that period to make sure you're truly recovering."

Noa was in no position to protest this, but she actually felt nervous at the prospect of leaving the hospital. She wasn't sure she'd be able to acclimate herself to this… animal world.

She claimed some of Judy's belongings at the front desk: her police uniform and badge, a small "All-Purpose" taser, a wallet, and a cell phone.

Noa was curious as to what a rabbit would do with a taser, but her attention soon turned to the cell phone. It had many apps with – for want of a better word – 'animalized' versions of some of the apps she knew of: EweTube instead of YouTube, Zoogle instead of Google, Muzzletime instead of Facetime, etc.

Noa took these items, pausing for a second to look at some of Judy's photo ID. The rabbit she stared at looked youthful, optimistic, and exuberant, like the world was her oyster. Noa envied her already.

 _{J-Judy?}_ she said.

_{Yeah?}_

_{The doctor says I'm free to go. I'm just leaving the hospital.}_

_{So? That's great!}_

_{Yeah, but… I'm… I'm afraid…}_

_{Noa, I was a bit afraid too when I first came to Zootopia. I won't deny it has its downsides, but… well… cities are cities. They're not inherently bad or good. You just… live in 'em.}_

_{Okay…}_

_{Don't worry. I'm right here if you need any help!}_

**[[OST2]](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UuiTjfz1qAo) **

Even with these words of encouragement, Noa kept her eyes closed as she exited the hospital, only opening them when she felt the wind in her fur.

The first thing that jumped out at Noa was the scale. It felt like this was what happened when you jammed model railways of sixteen different scales into one layout and had a billion trains running on it. On the road in front of her, giant vehicles the size of Labor carriers trundled on past cars that Noa could practically pick up like toys if she wanted to.

Anthropomorphic mammals of just about every description surrounded Noa. A group of mice walked down the street in front of her, laughing about the latest internet meme, seemingly oblivious to the colossal rhinoceros rollerblading by them. Noa wasn't sure if she should be more careful she didn't get stepped on, or that she didn't step on anyone herself!

Noa's jaw hung open as she took the city scenes in. All of these scenes should have felt mundane to someone who'd lived in Tokyo as long as she had, but seeing it like this… It felt like she'd been on a desert island since birth and had only now just come back to civilization. It completely floored her.

_{Judy…}_

_{Yeah, Noa?}_

_{This city… It's just… Wow!}_

Judy seemed to chuckle over the link. _{Welcome to Zootopia, Officer!}_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1] I'm being intentionally ambiguous as to what kind of disk this is. Patlabor was originally set in the late '90s, but was first created in the late '80s, so the movement discs in the show are of the 3½-inch floppy variety. This wouldn't gel well with the late 2010s, or even the late '90s (Apple introduced the iMac – which had no floppy drive – the same year Patlabor's "Early Days" OVA is supposedly set in), so I left things ambiguous in this moderately updated version of Patlabor.
> 
> [OST1] - Toshihiko Sahashi - "Procrastination" - soundtrack from "The Big O"
> 
> [2] AV-0 Peacemaker – Law enforcement patrol Labor manufactured by Shinohara Heavy Industries as a successor to the AV-98 Ingram. Now in use by SV2 Division 1. Height: 8.2 meters. Weight: 6.21 metric tons (7 metric tons when fully equipped). Equipped with a 44mm revolver cannon (loads 6 rounds) stored in the right calf, and an anti-Labor stun stick stored under a shield mounted on the left forearm.
> 
> [3] MPL-97S Python – Law enforcement patrol Labor manufactured by Manabe Heavy Industries. Formerly used by SV2 Division 1. With the advent of the AV-0 Peacemaker, the Python has been relegated to service as a training Labor.
> 
> [4] ASUKA-MPL-96 Taisyo – Law enforcement patrol Labor manufactured by Shinohara Heavy Industries. Formerly used by SV2 Division 2. Essentially an industrial Labor with police colors and a siren, the Taisyo was retired from police service to make way for the AV-98 Ingram.
> 
> [OST2] Kenji Kawai - "Shidoh!" ("Activate!") - Soundtrack from Patlabor - the Mobile Police tv series.
> 
>  
> 
> Whew!
> 
> Apologies for the lack of Zootopia action. I'll try not to create such imbalanced chapters in future. Hopefully, the next chapter will make up for this one!


	4. Not My Building

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now it's Noa's turn to be introduced in earnest to Judy's world. As the former human handles the intricacies of the great mammal metropolis of Zootopia, Judy finds herself matching wits with Kiichi Gotoh, Division 2's too-clever-by-half Captain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What's up, folks! Time for another chapter of Imposter Syndrome! I was hoping this chapter would be shorter than the last one, but instead it wound up being longer... Huh...
> 
> On the upside, the action here is more evenly distributed between Zootopia and Patlabor compared to the last chapter!
> 
> For those of you who've gotten this far, thank you for putting up with my weird premise!

Noa grabbed 'her' cell phone to see if it had a Maps app. Thankfully, it did.

 _{Judy? What's your address?}_ Judy told her the address of the "Grand Pangolin Arms" apartment building. Noa punched the address in and found that she could take transit there relatively quickly. She then checked Judy's wallet and found that there was a "Current" card in there. _{Current is like Pasmo, right?}_ **[1]**

 _{Pasmo?}_ said Judy.

_{A-a card you use to pay your bus and subway fare?}_

_{Oh, yeah! It's good you told me. I'll need to know that!}_

There was a subway station not far from the hospital. Noa, continually glancing around her, made her way to the station.

Once she got to the platform, the sheer level of accommodation for different-scaled animals boggled her once again. Some sections of the platform were earmarked for larger animals like elephants and rhinos. Above her was a second, miniscule, catwalk-like platform. When the train pulled in, Noa realized that this platform lined up with a second, attic-like level of the subway car meant for the city's smaller residents.

On the train itself, Noa found herself glancing around at pumas, deer, beavers, raccoon dogs, and probably a few animals she'd probably never heard of before, all calmly sitting on the seats that lined the car.

Suddenly, Noa heard a growling noise from right next to her. Sitting there was a massive lion who didn't look too happy. Noa was worried, given that the lion obviously had sharp teeth and claws.

Then Noa realized that the lion's attention was directed to his phone, which seemed to be open to a news article.

"Front-office pinheads!" he growled, before looking up to see that Noa, and a few other animals around the car, were staring at him. The lion pointed to his phone, screen turned outward as he explained to the crowd, "The Rovers are trading away Evan Prowley!"

All the other animals that were looking at him stopped staring. There was at least one groan of dismay at the news.

"So much for making the playoffs next year…" the lion groaned, staring at his phone's screen again. Then he suddenly became cognizant of Noa sitting next to him. "Hey, you're Judy Hopps, aren't you?"

"Uh, yeah?" Noa remarked, weakly.

"Heh! I owe you one for what you did to Bellwether!" the lion chuckled, "My brother-in-law's a cop. He nearly lost his job after that press conference."

"Oh…"

"Hey, don't feel too bad! You got her in the end, right? My mother-in-law's still mad at you, but _I'm_ not. I mean, that crazy sheep had the entire city fooled! Jake – that's my brother-in-law, Jake Delgato – he tells me that the sheep that grilled you was working for Bellwether, so you were pretty much railroaded into it. Hell, we _all_ were!"

Just then, the train pulled into a station. The lion got up, taking a laptop bag with him. "Sorry, it's my stop! It's been nice meeting you! If you see Jake, tell him I said hi!"

Noa was left in the subway car, pondering what had happened.

A fearsome-looking lion had gotten mad over (she assumed) a sports team trade and then had a quick, seemingly friendly chat with a rabbit about his brother-in-law, who may or may not be a co-worker of the rabbit in question.

_{Judy?}_

_{Yeah?}_

_{You called that whole back-and-forth-questions thing 'tennis,' right?}_

_{Yeah. I just figured it was a good analogy.}_

_{I've got a helluva serve for you…!}_

* * *

Back at SV2, Judy had been wondering why nobody in the office was doing anything. _{Just as well. I think it was your turn to ask.}_

 _{Okay…}_ Judy got the impression Noa was taking a deep breath, _{How the hell does all this work?!}_

_{What do you mean?}_

_{I mean, how did this all start? What do the meat-eaters eat? How do the rodents avoid getting stepped on? Why-}_

_{Slow down, Noa! One question at a time! That's why I called it tennis! Try and distill it!}_

_{Okay…}_ another mental 'deep breath' from Noa, _{How is it that predators and prey are just… living together? Why is no one eating each other?}_

Judy groaned. _That_ was the 'distilled' version of Noa's question?! _{Well, predators around here eat meat from things like chicken, fish, and bugs – all of which are farmed – so it's more convenient to go to your local Sheepway than to hunt your prey – not to mention less likely to get you arrested for murder.}_

 _{Okay… How about_ your _question?}_

From her tone, Judy instantly saw Noa's game. She wanted to power through Judy's answers quickly so she could get her own questions answered quickly. Judy thought it was fair, given Noa's predicament.

 _{What do you use Patlabors for?}_ Judy wound up asking.

_{Well, Labors – that's what we call those robots – are typically used for heavy industrial or construction work. But occasionally, you get somebody misusing them.}_

_{Misusing them how?}_

_{Like for terrorism, using them while drunk, or really stupid stuff like smashing their ex-girlfriend's car.}_

Judy gaped. _{Humans use giant robots for that?!}_

Noa seemed to sigh over their mental link. _{Yeah, I don't know what you must think of us. I personally think it's wrong to use Labors to do your dirty work. SV2's meant to deal with Labor crime. It's our job – me and Alphonse – to bring those guys to heel – take 'em down before they hurt someone.}_

Judy glanced over at the two massive Ingrams. She could understand where Noa was coming from. _{Alright, your turn!}_

_{Um… How did Zootopia get started? How did animals become so… civilized?}_

_{Well, the going theory is that a major drought caused many mammals – predator_ and _prey – to band together around one of the last remaining watering holes. They agreed to put aside their differences and cooperate to weather the drought – and that spirit of cooperation stuck. Aquavitae Common – near Precinct 1 and New City Hall – is supposed to be on the site of that old watering hole – though I think some archaeologists have said that's wrong…}_

_{Huh! That sounds like something out of a kids' book back in my world!}_

_{What?}_

_{I meant that in a good way! It's pretty heartwarming, that whole 'spirit of cooperation' stuff!}_

Judy wasn't sure whether to smile or frown at that sentiment. It reminded her of herself when she was a kit – optimistic, completely faithful to the idea of Zootopia being a place where anyone can be anything. But she'd been a cop long enough to know that the city had its dark side – the Meat Trade, rampant specism, the Night Howler Incident, Bellwether's power grab…

The former bunny doe was unsure if she should tell Noa about this dark side or wait a while.

Noa herself interrupted Judy before she could decide either way. _{Your turn!}_

Judy decided to focus on something more pedestrian. _{How about diet? What am I supposed to eat in this body?}_

 _{Well, I think you can eat a lot…}_ said Noa, _{I mean, if it's in the store and it says that it's food, then you should be able to eat it.}_

_{What, no rumination or anything like that?}_

_{What's rumination?}_

_{Never mind. What I'm trying to say is, am I a predator or prey mammal?}_

* * *

Noa stiffened as she got off the subway at last. _That_ was an awkward question.

_{Um… neither?}_

_{What?}_

_{I mean, humans don't go out hunting for their food. We just get it in the store-}_

_{No, no,_ no _!}_ Judy sounded exasperated, _{I mean, do humans eat meat or plants?!}_

_{Oh, both!}_

_{Both?}_

_{Well, I mean, I've eaten salads_ and _I've eaten hamburgers-}_

_{What are ham-burgers?}_

_{Well, they're-}_

"Excuse me!"

Noa turned around. A cow-woman was approaching her from further down the platform, looming large over the bunny as she held up Judy's comparatively tiny wallet. "You dropped this!"

"Oh, uh… Thanks!" Noa took the wallet from the cow-woman's hoof.

"Don't mention it!" said the cow, giving Noa a pleasant smile before continuing on her way.

Noa blinked after the cow, then continued, _{You can stick to plants if you want to. Just don't eat 'em off the side of the road or anything.}_

Now Noa was considering becoming a vegetarian herself, even if she _did_ become human again.

 _{Okay, your turn!}_ came Judy's voice.

 _{Well, I guess, is there anything I should know about_ my _diet?_ } asked Noa, _{I mean, rabbits in my world eat just plants. Would I be able to eat meat as well since I'm part-human?}_

 _{No!}_ said Judy, _{No meat at all! Unless you want to spend the next few hours throwing up! And what do you mean, 'part-human'?!}_

_{Well, I'm a human-shaped rabbit, right?}_

* * *

Judy didn't know what to make of that remark. _{Noa, there are no humans in my world. Us mammals just evolved this way. We keep most – if not all – of the major traits our ancestors left us.}_

_{Oh. Sorry… Your turn!}_

_{Let me think…}_ Judy found herself walking close to Unit 1 – aka. "Alphonse." This time, she found herself feeling her hand over the Labor's leg. Judy wondered what animal was most comparable to its size. This made Judy remember how the uniform scale of the human world had thrown her perceptions awry.

Judy was about to ask Noa how tall she was (in human form, that was), but then she noticed one of the mechanics passing her by had a measuring tape clipped to his belt and a clipboard in his hands.

"Do you mind if I borrow measuring tape? And your clipboard?" she asked.

The mechanic let the former rabbit have both items – complete with the pencil that had been tied by a string to the clipboard. She then ran behind the Patlabor's leg, reaching the wall that lay under the maintenance catwalk above.

Judy then held the clipboard atop her head, touching one edge of it to the wall. She then used the pencil to draw a line on the wall where the clipboard touched it.

Then, she used the tape measure to measure the distance from the floor to the line. It was roughly 160 centimeters.

"Whoa…" Judy's rabbit body wouldn't even have been waist height compared to that! She remembered that at her last physical, she'd been a little over 60 cm (not counting her ears)! She quickly marked this off on the wall.

" _Assuming human meters are the same as our meters,"_ Judy thought, " _Right now I must be around wolf height!"_ Nuts to Alphonse! Just by walking around in a human body, she was getting an impression of what it was like to be a bigger mammal!

Judy soon ran over back in front of the Labor and bent down on one knee, trying to get her head down to the same height as the 60-cm mark she'd made on the wall. Then she looked up at the giant machine from as close to her original rabbit height as she could muster.

Now her head barely made it over Alphonse's ankles. _Yikes!_ Even elephants would run screaming if something Labor-sized traipsed through Zootopia!

 _{Sorry I took so long!}_ remarked Judy, handing the tape measure and clipboard back to the mechanic, _{I've noticed everyone wears shoes around here. When is it okay to not wear shoes?}_

* * *

Noa stopped and looked at her own bare, oversized bunny feet, only realizing now that she'd not put on any footwear. She then looked at the street around her. Nobody had called her out on her shoelessness – probably because there wasn't a hint of footwear anywhere in sight!

Noa nervously focused on answering Judy's question, having picked her next one. _{Well, the rule of thumb is that you don't wear your shoes in your home or someone else's home – unless it's western-style.}_

_{Western-style?}_

_{Yeah, I think taking your shoes off at home is only a tradition here- er,_ there _in Japan – that's the country where I live.}_

_{How about at work?}_

_{No, not at work!}_ said Noa, _{You keep 'em on at work – where_ I _work, anyway! What about here? When do you wear shoes?}_

_{Generally, only when it's necessary – like in construction sites, some formal events, or just making a fashion statement. I wear paw wraps when on duty myself.}_

_{Okay…}_ Noa was glad that her feet wouldn't be _too_ unprotected. Even so, these new feet seemed pretty hardy, given that she'd been walking on concrete for the past while and hadn't noticed a thing.

By now, Noa had made it to the Grand Pangolin Arms. It was a narrow brick apartment building that reminded Noa of the tenement buildings she'd seen in a postcard Kanuka had sent from New York City. The building's weathered, vaguely _art nouveau_ façade was a stark contrast to Noa's larger, impersonal concrete block of an apartment building back in Tokyo. Clearly, this building had been around for far longer.

This thought made Noa seize up a little. Back in Tokyo, modernist apartment buildings like hers had been built _en masse_ after the city had been pummeled by firebombing in World War II, so buildings as old as this one were very rare. Noa looked around and saw several other buildings that looked to be around the same age. Did this mean that the city hadn't seen any major wars? At least in the last hundred or so years?

Kanuka or Kumagami would probably have some insights here. One of them would probably make some big absolutely correct deduction about Zootopian culture from this neighborhood and its architecture.

Nice work, Izumi. Now you're making yourself homesick _and_ misanthropic!

Noa now made her way into the building to the apartment Judy named. It was a Spartan, one-room affair, with a simple bed, a desk, a short chest of drawers, and a suitcase with a microwave oven perched on top. The furniture seemed to be scaled for her – for a rabbit at least – so at least here she didn't feel like a toddler. Still, the ceiling was rather high…

Noa flung herself on the bed, studying the ceiling for a while before turning her attention to the four photos on Judy's desk. She got up off the bed to examine them. One was of Judy enthusiastically hugging a shorter, older-looking male rabbit in a baseball cap (her father?). One was of Judy dancing at some sort of concert next to what Noa recognized as the fox from the hospital and alley (they must be friends). One showed Judy, the older male rabbit, an older female rabbit (Judy's mother?), and an impossible number of bunnies of varying ages (siblings?). Finally was an image of Judy with a downright adorable little bunny climbing on her shoulder (couldn't be Judy's daughter; maybe a little sister or some other young relation?).

All this served to remind Noa that this wasn't her body… wasn't her apartment… wasn't her _life_ …

"If none of this is mine, what does that make _me_ …?" Noa mused aloud, feeling her ears touch her back again.

"None of it's yours?!" came a loud, muffled male voice from behind Noa. She turned around and realized it was coming through the opposite wall. "What, are ya thinkin' of becoming a monk or something?!"

"What kinda cop becomes a monk?!" came another, similar voice from behind the wall.

"You've seen what she's got in there! She's practically taken a vow of poverty already!"

"Shut up! So she's minimalist! That's not asceticism! It's low-budget living!"

" _You_ shut up! She'd make a _great_ monk! There's nothing wrong with monkdom!"

" _YOU_ shut up!"

Noa found herself nervously backing away from the voices as the argument continued. _{Judy… Your walls are getting angry…!}_

A mental sigh came from Judy. _{That'll be the Oryx-Antlersons next door. My apartment doesn't have the best soundproofing in the world…}_

"No, _YOU_ shut up!"

"No, _YOU_ shut up!"

"No, _YOU_ shut up!"

Noa's jaw hung open. _{Don't they have jobs?!}_

_{They both work at home.}_

"No, _YOU_ shut up!"

"No, _YOU_!"

"No, _YOU_!"

Noa groaned. _{How often do they argue like this?}_

_{So often you won't even notice it.}_

Just then, Noa felt her pocket vibrate and she took out Judy's phone. It was a text from someone called "Nick":

" _Bogo sez ur out of hospital. u alright?"_

* * *

_{Uh, Judy? I just got a text from a guy named Nick. What should I do? What's your phone's passcode?!}_

"Nick?!"

Judy had to cover her mouth after her outburst. Thankfully, she'd decided to step out of the building and see what it was like on the outside.

With all the chaos, Judy had completely forgotten about her vulpine partner. Had he been the one to take Noa to hospital? Had he grown concerned? Did he think she was dead?!

"My passcode's-!" Judy caught herself trying to verbalize her message, _{My passcode's eight-eight-one-six-one-eight. What does the text say?!}_

_{He says someone named 'Bogo' told him you were out of hospital and that he wants to know if you're okay. Who is this guy?}_

Oh, Nick… This was just like him. _{Nick Wilde. He's my partner on the force. He was with me until just before I got switched. He's probably worried sick after what happened last night… Still, he shouldn't be texting on duty!}_

* * *

_{Still, he shouldn't be texting on duty!}_

Oops! After hearing what Judy had said about Nick being worried, and putting two and two together about the fox from the alley and the hospital, Noa had already texted Nick back. _"Im fine. Im at home. Bogo gave me a few days off."_

It wasn't long before Nick got back to her. _"What no sermon 4 txting on duty? Mustve been some bump on the head lol"_

Noa didn't know what to make of that text.

Nick fired off another text before Noa could ask Judy what to do about the last one. _"Srsly tho carrots r u sure ur memories back yet?"_

" _Sure."_ What else could Noa say?

" _OK then. Might stop by ur place once I come off duty. Ill tell Ben u say hi!"_

" _Thx"_

 _{Everything alright?!}_ Judy broke in.

 _{Oh, everything's fine.}_ Noa said warily, _{Nick says he'll be coming by your apartment though.}_

 _{Oh…}_ a mental sigh came from Judy, _{I guess that was pretty much inevitable. I'll help you deal with him.}_

_{There's a photo of you and a fox in your apartment. Is that fox Nick?}_

_{Yeah… We took that photo at Gazelle's Emergency Services Charity Concert a while ago.}_

Just then, Judy's phone exploded with another text. Noa looked at the screen. It was from somebody named "Ben." Must've been the same Ben Nick mentioned.

" _OMG JUDY U OK?! :o{ :o{ :o{"_

 _{Got another text, Judy!}_ relayed Noa, _{It's from someone called Ben! Wants to know if you're ok!}_

A mental chuckle. _{That'll be Benjamin Clawhauser. He's the front desk officer at Precinct 1. Just tell him I'm fine and that he shouldn't be texting on duty either.}_

Noa complied. _"Im fine. Just got out of hospital. Memorys back 100%. Just texted with Nick and he'll be stopping by after his shift."_ Noa sent it before she realized she'd forgotten to tell him not to text on duty.

Ben got back quickly. _"I know. Nick just txted me. Is there any thin I can do?! anything at all? :o{ :o{ :o{"_

Judy must be popular at work, Noa thought. Another text from Ben came before Noa could think of what to do next;

" _Hang on_ /:o. _Dont u usually tell me not to txt on duty by now?"_

" _I was about to."_ Noa lied.

" _Oo: OH SRY MY BAD X{ X{ X{ X{ Ill get back 2 wrk. sry to bug you get well soon c ya :o3"_

That just left Noa in Judy's apartment.

 _{You must be really popular at work, Judy…}_ she mused, a grin breaking across her lapine muzzle.

* * *

_{Well, I wouldn't know about 'popular'…}_ said Judy, who was back in the SV2 building by now.

Suddenly, the same eerily calm voice from the PA system broke in, but this time it was right behind her. "Um, Izumi?"

Judy turned around abruptly. Somehow, without her noticing (stupid tiny human ears!), a tall, black-haired, stone-faced, droopy-lidded human male had snuck up behind her. This human was wearing a white collared uniform with orange accents and was bending his head uncomfortably close to Judy.

 _{Noa, quick!}_ Judy shouted into the link, _{Droopy-lidded black-haired guy. No sense of personal space. Need a name!}_

 _{Crap!}_ Noa groaned, _{It's Captain Gotoh!}_

"SIR!" Judy saluted abruptly. _This_ was the 'tricky' captain?

"Could we have a quick word?"

Judy then followed Captain Gotoh back up the stairs into an office with two desks. The former rabbit went through all the potential meanings of the word 'tricky' that could apply to this human.

Gotoh just sat himself down behind one of the desks with his back to the window and reclined lackadaisically. Judy found that Gotoh almost perpetually spoke in an odd, rambling voice, as if he were recalling a daydream. "I understand you've had some issues lately."

"Sir?"

"Yamazaki says you were downcast last night, and that Shinohara and Kumagami had to carry you home, and now I've noticed you were particularly slow to mobilize during that stillborn deployment."

Oh no. This whole body-swapping problem wasn't going to lose Noa her job, was it?

"Now, in the time that you've been with Division 2," Gotoh continued, "I've noticed that you don't get drunk easily, so unless somebody spiked your drinks last night, I don't think alcoholism is going to be a problem. I _have_ however found that you may have reason to be overwrought."

"Overwrought, sir?"

"Five deployments in the last eight days is a high number by any stretch of the imagination." Gotoh said as he lit up a cigarette. Judy grimaced. There was a 'no smoking' sign not ten feet away from his desk! And this guy was a police captain?! "And I don't imagine that false alarm earlier helped. Now your teammates are becoming worried, and I'm beginning to feel the same."

"Sir?" Something about Captain Gotoh reminded Judy of someone. Bogo? No. Bogo would probably throw a fit at the human for his cavalier behaviour and tell him to put that damn cigarette out.

"I've noticed that you haven't been up to your usual practices of polishing Unit 1, and that you are considerably less talkative now."

"Well, sir, I-"

"In fact, I'd go so far as to say you've been acting like a _completely different person_ …"

Judy could have been knocked down with a feather.

Gotoh kept on going. "Now, then. I'm not sure what happened to you last night, but I can put a picture together, so if there's anything you'd like to share, please do."

Judy gulped. Kiichi Gotoh was clearly no mammal's fool.

"I'm sorry, sir!" she said, "I know you're looking out for your officers and that we've got a tough job to do, but please! Don't take any of this out on Noa! It's not her fault I can't do what she can! I don't know what's going on, but I'm going to do everything in my power to bring back the Noa Izumi you all know! I don't know what Shinohara or Yamazaki have been saying about me acting like someone else or forgetting how to drive a Patlabor, but-"

"They never mentioned anything about that." Gotoh said, gesturing with his cigarette toward Judy, " _You_ did just now."

Judy's human face turned white as a sheet. He'd been leading her on the whole time. He had no idea about the body-swapping at all!

 _Now_ she figured out who Gotoh reminded her of. That half-lidded expression should have been a giveaway. All that was missing was that obnoxious vulpine smirk.

"Y-you _hustled_ me, sir!" Judy sputtered in disbelief.

"Hustled?" Gotoh's brows perked up in confusion. "That's a funny way of putting it…"

"F-forget what I said, sir!" Judy said, raising her hands. "Like I said, I'll get back in the swing of things if it's the last thing I do. I just need to-"

"You're not doing anything." said Gotoh at last. "In fact, I'd say you've been doing too _much_."

"Sir?"

"If we _are_ to 'bring back the Noa Izumi we all know'…" Now _there_ was the obnoxious smirk - Gotoh would've made a fine fox. "…then I'd say it's time for a break."

Gotoh stood up and looked out the window onto the harbor.

"You can stay until the end of your shift. Once that's over, take the next two days off."

"But sir-"

"No buts, Izumi. I'd give you longer, but this is intensive work. I can't have one of my officers gone for long. Still, things seem to be simmering down. That tax bill the Diet passed may have made people angry enough to start that Labor rampaging spree that's wearing SV2 down, but things seem to be easing up now, and Division 1's incident resolution numbers have been going up of late. We might as well make use of them covering for us."

"Sir?"

"Izumi, the reason I let you and the others go to that bar was so you could all decompress. The last thing I wanted it to do was make you feel worse."

"Oh…"

"Kumagami can cover for you in your absence, and I can cover for her if need be." Gotoh, continued, turning back to Judy, "But once you come back, I want you back at your best. Is that clear?"

"Y-yes, sir!" Judy saluted.

"Good. That's all."

Judy turned to leave. Captain Gotoh's suspicions had been raised – no thanks to her big mouth – but was this a curse or a blessing in disguise? She now had two days off. She'd have to make the most of it.

"Just one thing other thing, sir." Judy said, turning back to Gotoh, who was sitting behind his desk again. She was probably pushing her luck, but Judy got the feeling that if she didn't say anything now, she never would.

"Yes?"

"I don't think you should be smoking in here, sir." Judy winced, "It's bad for your health."

Gotoh's eyebrows perked up again as he put his head in his hands and studied the ceiling. "Is that so…?"

The Captain's eyes never left the ceiling, but the cigarette never left his mouth either. Judy just nervously edged her way out of the office.

At least now she knew what Noa had meant when she'd said Gotoh was 'tricky.' 'Tricky' like a certain fox, more like! Now Judy tried to imagine Nick Wilde as a Captain…

* * *

A shiver passed through Chief Adrian Bogo's spine as he looked up from his papers. Odd. Was there a draft in here? And why had the image of Wilde in a Captain's uniform popped into his head?!

Oh Lord.

Wilde.

In a position of authority.

Another shiver went down the water buffalo's spine as he reached for his intercom. "Clawhauser! Which drawer did you put my Padvil pills in again?!"

* * *

Judy found herself walking back to the hangar, looking up at the massive form of Patlabor Unit 1.

Once she came off duty today, she'd have two days to prove that she could be a real cop in a strange new town.

Now didn't that sound familiar?

Judy then filled Noa in on what happened in the office.

 _{Listen, Noa.}_ Judy explained. _{We got lucky today, but sooner or later, they're gonna want you in that robot again. I know you care a lot about Alphonse, so you probably don't want me trashing it out there, right?}_

* * *

Noa hated to admit it, but Judy was right. _{Okay… You have an idea then?}_

 _{My Chief gave you five days off. Your Captain's given me two.}_ Judy explained, _{I say we put that time to good use.}_

_{Oh?}_

_{Yes. I know you're outside of your comfort zone already, but you know more about this stuff than I ever will, so… Over the next two days, I would like you to teach me how to drive Alphonse.}_

[ **[OST1]** ](https://youtu.be/1Zgc_D7GwEk)

_**I'M GONNA FLY, FLY AWAY!** _

Noa's brows raised. Two days. Two days to teach a bunny girl who had never _seen_ a Labor until several hours ago.

 _{I know it's not ideal, but we don't have a choice.}_ Judy said.

_**CONDITION GREEN!** _

Noa sighed. For Alphonse's sake, she might as well use what little control over the situation in Tokyo she had. _{Okay, I'll do it!}_

_**When despair takes you by surprise, I'll come right to your aid!** _

_{You've been willing to help me out here in Zootopia, so I figure I owe you that much.}_

_**JUST FLY, FLY AWAY!** _

_{Okay then!}_ said Judy.

_**Your pain's already forseen…** _

_{One way or another, we'll get through this!}_ Judy vowed, _{Me, you, Alphonse. We'll find those trailers, find out what's going on, and one way or another, we'll make it right!}_

_(Right!}_

… _ **on my heart's radar's watchful eyes, so there's no need for you to ever feel afraid!**_

"Hey, could you turn down that music?!"

"Sorry, Mr. Oryx-Antlerson!" Noa ran to switch off the radio alarm clock on Judy's windowsill.

 _**JUST I'M GONNA FLY AWA-** _ _*click*_

Pity. Noa had liked that song!

"Oh, leave the bunny cop alone! I kinda liked that song!" came the voice of the other Oryx-Antlerson.

"Shut up!"

" _You_ shut up!"

Noa's ears flattened in annoyance. _{But Judy?}_

_{Yeah?}_

_{I am_ not _teaching you from your apartment!}_

* * *

Nick Wilde had nothing against Officer Danny Fangmeyer. The fox's interim partner was affable and cheery, if a bit flighty. All the same, Nick couldn't wait until Judy came back on duty.

On that note, Nick couldn't help but feel like something was… _off_ about Judy, despite those texts – maybe even _because_ of them. And try as he might, the image of his partner screaming in utter terror at a puddle in the dark alleyway would not leave his mind.

Of course, Nick may have just been overthinking things. Plus, it hadn't even been a full day since that night in the alley. That rabbit may still have been recovering from what happened. When he got off duty he'd probably walk into Judy's apartment and find her bouncing off the walls begging for her leave to end so she could go back on the beat!

But still – what had happened in that alley?! And what on Earth had gotten Judy so scared?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1] Pasmo - A rechargeable, contactless smart card primarily used for public transit in real-life Tokyo.
> 
> [OST1] Hiroko Kasahara, "Condition Green" (first opening to Patlabor – The New Files). English lyrics by yours truly.
> 
>  
> 
> Yeah. If that OST was too overt, just let me know. I figured that since the music was playing was in-universe, I could get away with it.
> 
> I may include future cues, but with only the footnote indicating it - no lyrics unless it's playing in-universe for whatever reason.


	5. Not My Images

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Judy gets ready to start "Labor Piloting 101", Noa finds herself getting to know some of Judy's acquaintances, including a certain fox...

“Nothing at all?!” Judy said, incredulous.

“Hey, don’t look at me like that!” said Shigeo “Shige” Shiba, who according to Noa was SV2’s _de facto_ Assistant Chief Mechanic, “You don’t exactly find police-grade Labor training sims in your local game store!”

“I just want to make sure I’m in good condition when I return to piloting!” said Judy. “If there was a way I could keep my game up while at home, I’d really appreciate it!”

Judy wasn’t sure how the brown-haired, large-chinned bespectacled mechanic would react to her request. She’d asked Noa who to ask about Labor training and Noa had recommended either Asuma (who Judy feared was becoming too suspicious), Chief Mechanic Sakaki, or Shige.

From what little Judy had seen of Shige, he’d seemed pretty amicable, but the mechanic seemed downright exasperated now.

“I can tell you’re worried,” said Shige, “but I don’t think a police-grade Ingram simulator could even fit through your front door!

“Well, what if I _made_ one?”

“Huh?!”

“What if I were to make a Labor simulator for home use? How would I go about that?”

“You’re joking, right?!” Shige sputtered.

Judy’s eyes narrowed.

“Ah, sweet Christmas, you _aren’t_!” Shige groaned, “Not only is that the exact opposite of practical, I’m not sure it’s what you need right now!”

“What do you mean, ‘what I need’?!”

“The others…” Shige gestured to a group of mechanics milling around Unit 2,. “They’ve been overhearing things about last night and this morning. Stuff about you being worn down, or getting bitten by a centipede.”

Judy was perplexed. “Bitten by a centipede?!”

“Yeah, I think someone misheard something there. _The point is_ , nobody wants to see you work yourself into oblivion here! I heard Gotoh gave you a couple days off. You should be using them to relax! Take it easy! Live a little! You’re only human after all!”

Judy recoiled at that. “Only human”?! What did _that_ phrase mean?!

“I know, Shige.” she said, studying the floor, “I’m just worried I’m losing my edge. If I can’t figure out what I’m doing wrong, then…” Judy trailed off as she imagined Noa coming back to Tokyo jobless and alienated because of Judy’s mistakes.

Shige sighed. “I’m probably gonna regret this, but I _might_ be able to cobble something together.”

“You’d do that?!” said Judy, face brightening.

“It might not be ready until your second day off, but I’ve got some things I can put to use.”

“You’re the greatest, Shige!” said Judy, hugging the mechanic, whose face turned beet red.

“Ah-! uh…” Shige pushed himself free of Judy’s embrace, “It-it-it’s nothing! Us mechanics gotta look out for you Forwards! It gives us extra work when you trash your machines, so… yeah!” His expression hardened. “But you really think you can make it work?”

Judy took a deep breath, tone resolute. “I _always_ make it work!”

* * *

 _{No!}_ said Noa, _{Avoid jumping! At best, you’ll just make Asuma wince!}_

 _{Why not?}_ said Judy.

 _{Those leg mechanisms are under enough strain just walking!}_ Noa explained, _{Even if your feet stuck the landing, the mechanisms may not take the shock if you jump too much!}_

Judy was now out with Hiromi Yamazaki, helping him tend to some tomato plants. Apparently SV2’s remoteness meant that getting food for everyone was a chore (the nearest grocery store was a 45-minute round-trip away), so they they’d gone to some lengths to ensure self-sufficiency. To this end, the greenhouse Judy and Hiromi were in was built, as was a henhouse, and the mechanics even used a police speedboat to go out fishing.

 _{Asuma says food is key to police morale,}_ Noa had said, _{So a strong supply chain is a must!}_

In a bizarre way, this felt comforting to Judy, for it reminded her of growing up in Bunnyburrow. Judy had never figured that being a police officer in a city the size of Tokyo would bring her back to farming like this!

Judy sighed. _{Okay, so jumping is out, clotheslining is 'ehhh', punching is a last resort. How do you actually_ fight _in those things?}_

It was Noa’s turn to sigh. _{Alphonse has weapons to help him out.}_

_{What kind of weapons?}_

_{There’s a stun stick stored under his shield, for one.}_

_{Stun stick?}_

_{It’s also called an electromagnetic baton.}_ Noa explained, _{Basically it’s a rod that you jam into a Labor’s sensitive areas – like its batteries or computer banks. It delivers an electromagnetic pulse that should disable the Labor without hurting the pilot.}_

_{Ah, okay. Anything else?}_

_{Yes. There’s a revolver cannon stored in the Ingram’s right leg-holster. Ohta will tell you differently, but the gun’s an even bigger last resort than punching. Too much risk of collateral damage.}_

_{That’s alright. I’ve never used real guns anyway.}_

_{Oh?}_

_{Zootopia’s got strict gun control laws. Even cops mainly use tranq darts.}_

* * *

This calmed Noa. She’d always been uneasy around guns – and strict gun control was one thing that Tokyo and Zootopia had in common. **[1]**

Judy broke in, _{You feeling alright?}_

 _{Oh, I’m fine.}_ said Noa, _{Just a bit bored actually. I don’t feel like leaving your apartment, so I’m just kinda stuck here.}_

 _{How about some more question tennis?}_ said Judy, _{It’ll help you get ready to go out there.}_

_{Okay. Whose turn was it?}_

_{I think it was mine. Um… How do you humans put up with having no fur? I mean, why haven’t I frozen to death yet?!}_

_{Why don’t you just go naked if you_ do _have fur?}_

 _{…Touché.}_ Judy elected not to tell Noa about Naturalists and their attitudes toward clothes.

 _{And for the record, that was_ not _my turn!}_

_{Alright, alright! What’s your question?}_

Noa grumbled as she fished her enormous ears out from under her back. _{How do you manage these ears?! I mean, I can practically pick up radio signals with these things!}_

* * *

Judy would have wiggled her nose at that if she were still a rabbit, for it was the sort of insult bullies lobbed at her in her childhood. _{You get used to it.}_

“You okay, Izumi?” asked Hiromi, looking up from where he was crouched over a tomato plant.

“Oh, I’m fine!” said Judy. _{My turn! Are humans naturally telepathic?}_ That was a question Judy had been hoping to ask since she and Noa had established their mental link.

_{No…?}_

_{I just wanted to know because we seem to be communicating telepathically, and I wanted to know if it was a human thing.}_

_{Well, outside of anime and the like, there aren’t any ESPers in my world.}_ explained Noa, _{I’m guessing our link is just because our bodies are swapped.}_

 _{Ah, okay.}_ Judy remarked.

* * *

 

Meanwhile, Noa had brought her attention to the mirror leaning against the wall. It may have just been a small mirror to a larger mammal, but to a rabbit it was a full-length mirror.

Even after establishing contact with Judy and learning a bit about the lapine lifestyle, Noa couldn’t help but think about how… _alien_ this body looked to her. Steadily, she brought one of her long ears over her shoulder to get a good look at it. It felt pretty sensitive, especially on the inside. Noa then drew her attention to the eyes of the rabbit in the mirror. They were a deep violet. Noa wondered if there were rabbits back in her world with that kind of eye color. Noa then opened her mouth and examined her new teeth. Noa was a bit surprised that she could fit her giant incisors under her lips when she closed her mouth.

The first thing that jumped out at Noa was how wide-hipped and long-legged her new figure was. She figured that rabbits had powerful legs, so this kind of body made sense. Still, it looked downright weird… like she was looking at herself in a funhouse mirror.

Sighing, Noa turned to her side, and sure enough, she caught a glimpse of the inevitable piece of fluff emanating from her backside through a specialized hole in her pants. Experimentally, she reached her hand to it and felt it over. Like her ears, it felt sensitive, so she took her hand off of it quickly.

“Damnit…” Noa muttered. Why did she have to look so cute?!

Judy piped up. _{This isn’t part of the tennis, but is my- er,_ your _shift gonna come to an end soon?}_

 _{Uh… Shouldn’t be long now.}_ By now, it was apparent that time in Judy and Noa’s respective worlds was relatively synced.

 _{Come to think of it,}_ Judy mused, _{I think my shift back home would have come to an end right around now, so I think Nick might be-}_

_*Knock-Knock*_

_{Hang on a sec, Judy!}_ Noa went to the door. “Who is it?”

“Vulpine Delivery Service, miss!” came a brisk voice.

“What?” Noa was puzzled as she opened the door.

“One fox, hold the onions!” There stood Nick Wilde, having traded his police uniform for some sort of Hawaiian print shirt and brown pants, now giving a smug, eyes-half-lidded smirk that Noa thought made him resemble a cross between Asuma and Captain Gotoh.

Noa’s eyes soon travelled upward to notice the giant, overweight cat – a cheetah or a leopard by the look of things – standing behind the fox, smiling awkwardly. He had to be two or three times as tall as Noa’s bunny-body. This big cat had enormous cheeks and was wearing a faded red polo shirt and khaki shorts. **[2]**  “Hi…!” the cat said nervously.

“Hope you don’t mind.” Nick said, gesturing to the overweight feline, “Ben wanted to come and check on ya too.”

Ben? As in Benjamin Clawhauser?

“Come right in!” said Noa, unsure about how the giant cat would fit in the comparatively cramped apartment.

“You know, I think this is the first time I’ve been here!” Clawhauser remarked as he looked over the apartment.

“It’s nothing worth writing home about…” Noa murmured. Would Judy say something like that?

“Oh, it’s alright!” said Clawhauser, “I imagine you just- O-M- _Goodness!_ ”

“What?” said Noa.

“Who is _this_ little ball of fuzz on your shoulder here?” said Clawhauser, eagerly taking one of the photos on Judy’s desk and holding it in front of the rabbit, grinning. It was the one of Judy with a tiny bunny child climbing on her shoulder.

Noa had asked Judy about those photos in an earlier round of Question Tennis. “Oh, that’s Cotton, my niece. She’s five now.”

“ _Awwwww!”_ the big cat’s tail went into a question mark-like curve as his enormous cheeks perked upwards in a grin. “Cotton! Good name for a cute little fluffball like- _oh!_ ” Clawhauser suddenly covered his mouth and his ears flattened submissively. His eyes darted around the room before settling on Noa.

Noa would have asked what was wrong, but Nick broke in. “So, you feeling alright, Carrots?”

“Me? I’m-I’m fine. Still a bit sore around here though.” Noa felt the back of her head. That much wasn’t a lie.

“You sure?” said Nick, quizzically raising an eyebrow, “You were kind of… out of it in that alley.”

“Oh, that?” said Noa, “I don’t really remember what I did right after I got hit…” Again, not a _complete_ lie…

“Carrots, you were screaming at a puddle!” Nick said, mirth suddenly vanishing from his voice.

“Oh…” Noa grimaced as she remembered how she’d taken the sight of her new appearance.

“And later you were saying you didn’t know me and Bogo in the hospital!” Nick went on.

“Oh…” Noa felt her ears touch her back again as she studied the floor, “Guess I _was_ kinda out of it, huh?”

Nick sighed and sat down on Judy’s bed. “The doc said it was post-traumatic amnesia. Bogo said it seemed like your memory had come back. So do you know me now?”

 _{Judy!}_ Noa spoke into her link. _{I got a problem! Before our link came up, I told Nick I didn’t know him. The doctor said it was amnesia, but I need to get Nick to stop being suspicious!}_

 _{Okay…}_ said Judy, _{Listen to me...}_

As Judy recited her idea, Nick’s eyebrow raised at the rabbit’s silence.

“Carrots?”

‘Judy’ grinned mischievously. “You needn’t worry about my memory, Nicholas _Piberius_ Wilde…!”

**[OST1](https://youtu.be/UmXl7qqYjmE) **

“WHAT?!” Clawhauser doubled over in laughter.

Nick’s eyes were the size of (rabbit-scaled) dinner plates. “You… you… you promised not to tell anyone about that on the beat!”

“Well, we’re not _on_ the beat at the moment!” Noa chuckled.

“Piberius?!” Ben was grinning at Nick now.

Nick groaned. “My dad was a sci-fi buff, okay?!”

Noa didn’t get the reference, but she found herself giggling anyway at the fox’s petulant attitude.

“I preferred Jean-Luc Picattle! He was better-written!” came a voice through the wall.

“Come on!” came the other Oryx-Antlerson (unlike Judy, Noa could never keep track of which voice was Bucky’s and which one was Pronk’s), “The original was way better!”

“Shut up!”

“ _You_ shut up!”

“ _You_ shut up!”

As the Oryx-Antlersons descended into another round of bickering, the sheer absurdity of the situation made Noa’s laughter grow more intense. After all that had happened, it felt good to laugh.

Nick rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. Laugh it up, _Laverne_!”

“Is that _your_ middle name?” said Clawhauser, turning to Noa.

“Hey, it’s not a reference to anything!” giggled Noa – at least, she didn’t _think_ it was… She’d have to ask Judy.

“ _Laverne and Furley_ would beg to differ!” came an Oryx-Antlerson’s voice.

“Ooh!” said Nick, glancing at the wall with a grin, “I’ll have to remember that one!”

“Wouldn’t that make the fox Furley then?” said the other Oryx-Antlerson.

“Oh…” Nick’s grin vanished.

Noa laughed even louder, tears flowing from her eyes as she collapsed on the floor in bundle of mirth.

For the first time since waking up as a bunny, Noa felt like she truly fit in with this world of talking animals – that she and Judy really _could_ make this thing work…

* * *

The rest of their meeting had gone uneventfully. Ben had ordered take-out and shown them some funny videos. The three cops (and Judy’s nosy, noisy neighbors) had all had a good laugh.

It was almost enough to make Nick feel better about what was going on.

However, it wasn’t just him that was worried this time.

“Hey, Nick…” Clawhauser remarked as the fox and cheetah made their way to the subway station, “Did you feel like something was… _weird_ about Judy?”

“Weird?”

“Like she wasn’t really… there?”

“Well now that you mention it… There was… It felt like there was something in her eyes. Something… unfamiliar…”

“Mmmm…” Clawhauser rubbed his chin (one of them) as his brow furrowed in concentration.

“And it also felt like she was acting… _new_ to everything.” Nick continued, “I mean, she comes from out in the sticks, but no one’s _that_ wowed by the big city – especially after living here as long as she has!”

“So it’s _not_ just me…” Clawhauser murmured.

“You noticed something?”

“Well, it may be nothing, but you know when I saw that photo of Judy’s niece? Well, I accidentally called that little bunny ‘cute’ and Judy didn’t say anything about it…!”

* * *

Judy had just made it back to Noa’s apartment when she got a call on Noa’s phone.

_“Hey, Noa? It’s Shige.”_

“Oh hey, Shige!”

_“Listen, I just thought I’d call and let you know that your little do-it-yourself Ingram simulator is coming along faster than I thought. It may not look like much, but it may be enough to put you back in the swing of things! I may bring it around tomorrow morning if I have time.”_

“That’s great, Shige! Thanks!” Judy was glad. Everything was going according to plan so far!

 _“Oh, that’s not all!”_ the mechanic continued, _“It turns out Yamazaki was listening in on our convo earlier. He told me you’ve been a bit worried about your piloting ability lately, so I got some command car footage, some news footage and whatnot and put together a little compilation showing you just what you can do if you put your mind to it! I’m sending it to you now!”_

Sure enough, a video file was sent to Noa’s phone. It was titled “Noa Izumi’s Greatest Hits.mp4.”

 _“Like I said, us mechanics gotta look out for you Forwards!”_ Shige explained, _“You’ve always been a doer, Izumi. This’ll show you just how much you really_ can _do!”_

“Uh, okay! Thanks, Shige!”

_“Don’t mention it! See you tomorrow!”_

“See ya!”

Judy put the phone away. Then, after a bit of thought, she took it out again and opened Shige’s video file.

It started out with the camera in what Judy recognized as the interior of the SV2 building. Both of Division 2’s Patlabor units were in their maintenance berths. The camera panned up to reveal Noa Izumi, standing on one of the catwalks, wiping off Unit 1’s chest.

 _“Hey, Izumi!”_ came Shige’s voice from behind the camera, _“Whaddya doin’?”_

 _“Giving Alphonse a wax. What’s it look like?!”_ said Noa, as if it were plainly obvious.

 _“Why bother?”_ came Shige’s voice, _“I mean, it’s just gonna get scuffed up again the next time you deploy!”_

 _“Well,_ somebody’s _gotta do it! Can’t have Alphonse going out there looking all dirty! Gotta look good out there!”_

 _“Heh-heh!”_ video Shige laughed, _“Bet you the next guy you face just gets blinded into submission from how shiny you make the big guy!”_

 _“Heh!”_ video Noa chuckled, _“That’s one way to put it! I figure if I show those criminals how well-kept Alphonse is…”_

The camera zoomed in on Noa, who gave a teeth-bared look at her waxing job before glancing up at Unit 1’s head, beaming with pride and anticipation.

_“…they’ll know not to mess with him!”_

**[[OST2]](https://youtu.be/d2f13rxiThs) **

The scene abruptly cut. From then on, the only audio was an energetic pop song.

The first scene showed Unit 1 getting out of the maintenance berth and backing into its Carrier truck.

The next one showed the massive Labor sitting cross-legged on the ground surrounded by mechanics. Noa’s head was visible poking out of the Labor’s chest – Judy would later find out that the cockpit could be raised to poke out of the chest in case the cameras failed. The giant machine had some sort of rope strung between its fingers that it was trying to manipulate. It soon occurred to Judy that Noa was using Unit 1 to play Cat’s Cradle – and she was quite good at it!

The next scene must have been shot from a police car’s dashcam. It showed Unit 1 getting pinned from behind by a rounded blue Labor that reminded Judy of a suit of armor. To Judy’s surprise, the Ingram was able to flip the larger blue robot onto the ground, where it then raised a rod (the ‘stun stick’, Judy surmised) and thrust it into the larger robot’s neck. Electricity arced, and the blue robot stopped moving.

Suddenly, a second blue robot, identical to the first one, tried to rush Unit 1, but Noa must have been too fast for it, for in a flash, the stun stick had been jammed into the Labor’s face, and it too fell to the ground.

The third scene showed Unit 1 managing to sneak up (how could a six-ton robot be sneaky?!) on a red, four-legged Labor with what looked like a tank turret on its back. Before the red Labor could react, Unit 1 nonchalantly embedded its stun stick in the red machine’s turret.

Then it cut to Unit 1 – with Noa visible in the raised cockpit – pulling a gun on a red four-legged Labor (the same one from earlier?) whose cockpit was open. The red Labor’s pilot threw his hands up. With the music taking the place of the video’s audio, Judy couldn’t hear what Noa was saying, but she could guess it was something along the lines of “you’re under arrest!”

The next shot showed Unit 1 with its gun drawn on a green, four-legged Labor. The green Labor’s cockpit was open. Two humans were visible poking their heads out of the cockpit. One was tied up. The other was holding a bagged rod to the first one. All of a sudden, Unit 1 fired its weapon. Judy gasped, but to her amazement, the bullet went within a hair’s length of the green Labor’s occupants, and the wind the bullet generated as it passed by caused the gunman to drop his ‘weapon’, which was revealed to be an umbrella under a garbage bag. His ruse revealed, the hostage-taker fainted.

More and more scenes played of Noa conducting her duties with Unit 1. Judy couldn’t help but gape at all Noa had done. This was _not_ the sort of cop Judy had thought Noa was to begin with. Hell, she now resembled the sort of cop that Judy had wanted to be when she grew up; strong, resourceful, and always on her game.

Judy buried her head in her hands as she realized that Noa had left the former rabbit elephant-sized shoes- no, _Ingram_ -sized shoes to fill. Judy's parents had called her a 'trier' once upon a time. Just now, Shige had called Noa a 'doer'. Now she knew what the difference was...

“I don’t know when to quit…” she reminded herself, “I don’t know when to quit…!”

* * *

“Clawhauser!” grumbled Nick Wilde, glancing at the alarm clock on his bedside table, “Do you know what time it is?!”

 _“Look, Nick! I’m really,_ really _sorry!”_ said the cheetah on the other end of the line, _“But it’s been bugging me all night! I just have to tell you this!”_

Nick sighed, rubbing his eyes. “What is it?”

_“Well, after I got home, I felt bad about calling Judy’s niece cute, so I texted her saying I was sorry, and you know what she said?”_

“What did she say?”

_“She said ‘its alright. Cotton IS downright adorable. You can call her cute all you want.’”_

“Huh?!”

 _“Yeah, you heard me right._ She _says it’s_ okay _for_ me _– a non-bunny – to call her bunny niece cute!”_

Nick stared in confusion. Both he and Clawhauser knew that bunnies did _not_ like being called cute by other mammals – especially Judy, who considered the term belittling.

 _“So… what do we do?”_ asked Clawhauser, _“Should we tell Bogo something’s up with her?”_

“No! No…” Nick didn’t want to jeopardize Judy’s career if it turned out to be nothing. “I’d like to know more first. We’ll dig a little deeper, and if we find out it’s _that_ bad, _then_ we’ll go to Bogo.”

 _“But how do we find out more?”_ asked Clawhauser, _“She doesn’t come back on duty for another four days, and we’ll be on duty most of the time!”_

“I’ll think of something…” Nick said, “In the meantime, I have an appointment with the Sandmammal and so do you! G’night, Benjy!”

_“Okay… 'Night, Nick!”_

Clawhauser hung up. Despite his joke, Nick soon found himself having trouble sleeping. The fox tossed and turned, clawing at his pillows as he mulled over what had transpired.

There was no getting around it. Something funny _had_ happened to Judy in that alley – more than a bump on the head at any rate. Whatever it was had shaken that rabbit enough that her behavior had changed, and for some reason, she wasn’t telling anyone about it.

God, it was just like those three long months during the Night Howler Incident when Judy had turned in her badge and left for Bunnyburrow all over again!

"Come on, Nick!" the fox muttered to himself, "It's not like that at all. Judy's _not_ in Bunnyburrow. She's here in Zootopia!"

…wasn't she?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [1] Real-life Japan has very strict gun control laws. In fact, in Patlabor, it's heavily implied that the reason Ohta joined the force was so he could get to handle guns at all. Given the prevalence of tranquilizer dart guns in Zootopia, I figured that the same was true there.
> 
> [2] Dreaming up 'civvies' for Clawhauser was harder than I thought it'd be!
> 
> OST1: DAIZO – "YOU ARE THE ONE" – third opening to Patlabor – the New Files.
> 
> OST2: Yuko Nito – "Sono Mama no Kimi de Ite" – Opening to the Patlabor – The Mobile Police TV series.
> 
>  
> 
> I think that the scene with Nick and Clawhauser in Judy's apartment has to be my favourite part of this story to write thus far!


	6. Not My Regimen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noa and Judy find a surprising fact about their link, and they prepare to finally begin Labor training.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, folks! I'm baaaaaaaack!
> 
> But seriously though! I hope the wait for this chapter hasn't kept you in suspense too long!

Judy had a bad feeling about this place. It was a barren wasteland. Nothing was around her but rocks and sand. It felt vaguely like Sahara Square, but less hot and more… desolate.

She didn't have time to contemplate it for long though, for suddenly, a great black-and-white mass came crashing down in front of her.

When the dust cleared from Judy's vision, the rabbit saw that the crashing object was none other than Patlabor Unit 1 – "Alphonse."

However, the robot had clearly seen better days. An arm and a leg was missing from one side. The machine's armor was battered and dented. Sparks flew from where the missing limbs were supposed to attach. The green visor had shattered, revealing the camera behind it.

" **I mean, it's not like a** _ **bunny**_ **can go savage, right?"**

Judy experimentally climbed up to the machine's chest and opened the cockpit. There was Noa, in her piloting outfit, looking bruised and battered.

"Wha…?" the human was clearly dazed. She remained that way until Judy fished her out of the cockpit, and helped her onto the ground.

"Where… what…" Noa still seemed out of it. Then suddenly, her face paled and her expression turned to one of pure panic.

"We've got to get out of here!" the human sputtered.

"What?"

"It's coming! _Hurry_!" Noa then picked up the bunny doe like a stuffed toy and ran away from the crippled Labor.

"Noa! Noa! What is it?!" Judy.

Noa stopped, then looked skyward. "It's already here!"

Judy looked up.

" **The question is; will the Ingram be able to take down that kind of opponent?"**

_[[OST1]](https://youtu.be/9fLFleMn8Pc) _

There, hovering overhead like some vast predatory bird, was a giant robot. It was jet black in color, with a pair of long wings extending from its back.

Its head seemed to have long, thick horns extending out of the sides. Between these horns, a blood red visor covered the top half of its face.

It soon dove at the wrecked form of Alphonse. Noa took off and ran, still carrying Judy in her arms. An explosion occurred behind them, but Noa didn't seem fazed. She was breathing heavily and holding her eyes shut.

Suddenly, a great black shape flew overhead, and the ground shook as the black robot landed in front of them. Now it held Alphonse's severed head in its claw-like hand.

" **My child, we may be Evolved, but deep down, we're still…** _ **animals**_ **…"**

"NO!" Noa shrieked, and ran the other way. Suddenly they were now in the Rainforest District, just like the night Renato Manchas had gone savage and chased Judy and Nick. Noa and Judy were now running down a wooden bridge. The black robot stayed right on their tail, smashing the bridge up behind them.

"Noa, what's going on?!" Judy demanded, "What is that thing?!"

"The Black Labor…!" Noa panted, "The Black Labor…!"

" **For Pete's sake, this isn't some mecha anime where the main character is some emotionally stunted teenager… Don't you get it?"**

Noa was carrying Judy further and further down now. Now, Judy became cognizant of the blue flowers surrounding them on the Rainforest floor.

"Oh, no…" she gasped.

"What?" said Noa.

"Not here!" said Judy. "We have to get away from these flowers!"

"Judy, what is it?!"

"Night Howlers, Noa!" said Judy, "These flowers are Night Howlers!"

"Night… Howlers…?"

" **Fear** _ **always**_ **works! And I'll dart** _ **every**_ **predator in Zootopia to keep it that way!"**

Too late. Now the Black Labor was standing in front of them, the rain streaking down its glowing red visor.

"What's it doing?!" said Judy.

"I don't know…." said Noa, "I _never_ know what it's doing! It's like it's just trying to mess with us…!"

Suddenly a blue object sailed out of the forest and splattered all over the Black Labor's head and neck.

" _No_ …!" Judy gaped, "Noa, we have to run! _NOW!_ "

"Judy, what-"

"No time! Just run! _RUN!_ "

The Black Labor began to double over in convulsions.

" **You think I might try to…** _ **eat you?!**_ **"**

Pieces of armor soon fell off the Black Labor, as if it were shedding its skin.

The Black Labor's wings suddenly split open, replaced with black, feathered ones. The human-like hands of the machine were ripped apart as black, birdlike talons grew into their place. A lion-like tail erupted from its backside. The horrific transformation completed when the visor and mouthplate shattered as a great, hooked beak grew out of the machine. A pair of sickly green eyes with slit pupils now stared at them as the Black Labor – if it could even be called a Labor anymore – got down on all fours.

Now it looked like some grotesque, half-robot, half-organic creature; its piercing eyes showing only one thing; savagery.

"What the hell…?!" Noa gaped.

"NOA! RUN! NOW!" Judy screamed.

Noa finally got the message and ran.

" **Don't worry, missy! I'll avenge you!"**

Judy peered over Noa's shoulder to see the creature give a horrendous shriek and leap at them.

* * *

Judy woke up in a cold sweat, panting as though she had been the one running.

She looked over her body – yep, still stuck in Noa's human body.

 _{Noa?}_ she uttered into their link, _{Are you up?}_

 _{Y-yeah…}_ Noa stammered meekly into the link, _{I think I must've screamed in my sleep. Your neighbors were asking if you were alright…}_

 _{_ Are _you alright?}_

 _{I-I think so…}_ Noa murmured, _{I just had a weird nightmare is all…}_

 _{I think I had the same nightmare…}_ Judy glanced at Noa's alarm clock. It was ungodly early. _{Seeing as it featured giant robots, I figured you had a hand in it…}_

_{Wait, so you're saying my nightmare and your nightmare got together and had a baby?!}_

_{Not how I'd put it, but… yeah…}_ Judy thought about the Black Labor – and the monster it turned into. _{What_ was _that thing?!}_

_{The Black Labor – or I guess it's real name is[the Griffon](http://www.mahq.net/mecha/patlabor/patlabortv/type-j-9.htm) from what I've heard. We just knew it as the Black Labor for a long time…}_

_{So it's… real?}_

_{It used to be… It's gone now, but I still think about it… I had to take it on twice, and those were the only times I'd ever really felt…_ scared _when I was in Alphonse…}_

 _{Scared?}_ Noa had been solid as a rock in that compilation. Judy hesitated to think of what kind of opponent could scare her.

 _{It was like something out of an anime!}_ Noa seemed panicked at the mere recollection of the demonic machine. _{It moved way too fast, its reflexes were more like an actual human than I thought was possible! It didn't have any weapons – because it didn't_ need _any! Damnit, it could_ fly _! No Labor flies! Asuma says that sort of technology's gotta be five, ten years ahead of its time!}_

 _{But you took it down, right?}_ Judy was eager to help Noa calm down.

_{I did, but I'm not sure it helped matters… We never found out what made it so bleeding-edge. It self-destructed just as soon as the pilot got out.}_

_{Couldn't the pilot tell you anything?}_

_{That's where things got_ real _crazy!}_ Panic returned to Noa's voice, _{'Cause you know who was piloting that Labor?! A kid! A twelve-year-old kid!}_

_{What?!}_

_{A twelve-year-old kid who'd been treating the whole thing like it some kind of video game – with_ me _as the final boss!}_

_{What was a kid doing in a giant robot?!}_

_{We don't know! The kid only seemed to know so much, and some government types took custody of him, so now us cops may never know what was going on! But what we_ do _know just makes me terrified for what they'll throw at me next!}_

_{'They'? Who's 'they'?}_

Judy could just imagine Noa's breathing becoming faster and more labored. _{I wish I knew! But from what we got out of that kid, it sounded like 'they' had it out for me! Captain Gotoh seems to think so too! He thinks some shady Labor-maker is using us as guinea pigs for their prototypes!}_

 _{Well… maybe they'll think twice now that you've taken down this 'Griffon'…?}_ Judy tried to calm Noa down again, though she wondered what jobs guinea pigs worked in this world.

 _{I wouldn't be so sure...}_ Noa moaned, _{Before the Griffon, we had a couple encounters with another Labor – an unmanned one – it self-destructed, too. It had a friggin' particle beam! Captain Gotoh thinks that this beam-Labor and the Griffon were made by the same people. I sometimes wonder, if the Griffon was worse than the beam-Labor, and the guys behind them are still out there… is there something worse waiting around the corner? Worse than both the Griffon and the beam-Labor combined? Something I won't get so lucky with?}_

Judy thought about what had happened when the Black Labor had been hit with a Night Howler pellet in their dream. The former rabbit's own subconscious had no doubt given Noa a glimpse of that very scenario.

 _{Well, don't worry.}_ Judy assured Noa, _{Right now you're safe. Zootopia doesn't have any Labors – especially kinds with lasers or wings or whatever.}_

 _{What about your nightmare?}_ Noa asked.

 _{What about it?}_ Judy was uncomfortable about talking about her contribution to Noa's nightmare.

_{Should I worry about it…?}_

_{No. No, you shouldn't…}_ Judy clenched Noa's sheets as memories of the Night Howler Incident flowed through her head. _{That part of my life is over and done with. What you saw then was a bad memory. Nothing more…}_

* * *

Judy had always been an early riser. Still, she hadn't expected to be woken up before her alarm by a knock on the door.

Judy opened it to find Shige Shiba standing there, carrying a massive pile of PVC piping and boxes, as well as a folding chair. Judy almost didn't recognize him without his mechanic's uniform.

"Can I come in, please?!" the brunette groaned.

Judy quickly let Shige in, who was only too glad to set his load down on Noa's floor.

"Whew!" the human collapsed against a wall. "I gotta tell ya, this thing had better be worth it!"

"Okay…" Judy glanced at the pile, "What is it?"

"Oh, it's the simulator!"

"This stuff?" Judy raised an eyebrow at the pile.

"Well, not _yet_ it isn't!" Shige pulled himself out of the chair, "I came early so we could put it all together and show you how it works!"

"Okay…"

Judy and Shige then spent the next 45 minutes assembling the PVC piping into a sort of cage-like structure surrounding the folding chair. Then they began attaching an assortment of wooden dowels and boards to this cage, with various electronic components connecting them, with a computer hard drive set behind the folding chair.

"There we go…!" Shige said at last, marveling at his work, "It ain't pretty, but it'll help with the basics…" Shige's expression fell, "That is to say, the _very_ basics… The very _very basic_ basics… So basic it's probably more basic than basic probably… In fact, its ph level would probably be somewhere around-"

"Okay, Shige. I get it. It's basic." Judy rolled her eyes as she sat down in the folding chair. Hopefully Noa would help her make up for how 'basic' the ramshackle simulator was. "So how does it work?"

"Ah, I'm getting there!" Shige took some wires over to Noa's little TV and plugged them into the AV ports on the back. "Basically, the cage uses some spare VR components from the Ingram's hand controls to send signals to the fake-OS, so if you push down on those boards…" Shige gestured to the two wooden boards set at Judy's feet, "It _should_ be functionally like pushing the pedals on a real Ingram. Hang on, I'll fire it up!" The mechanic switched on the hard drive, inserted a disc into it, and then turned on the TV screen.

"Okay!" Shige then pulled out a video game controller. "Just use this to select what sorta simulation you want and _boom!_ Off you go!"

"Thanks, Shige!"

"Oh, and once you finish your simulation experience…" Shige fished a folded-up-sheet of paper out of his pocket. "Please fill out this feedback form so that we can address any issues in bug patches or update packages in future."

"Um, what-"

"It's a work in progress, okay?!" Shige squawked in exasperation.

Judy raised her hands. "It's okay, Shige! Like I said, I'll make it work!"

"Alright, alright…" Shige adjusted his glasses, "But uh… take it easy, okay…?"

* * *

Noa knew that she would have difficulty teaching Judy from the rabbit's apartment (why on earth would it offer 'complimentary de-lousing'?!), so she was searching for a nice, quiet place in the city to conduct her first lesson from.

Judy was a frequent jogger, so the ex-rabbit was able to give Noa some insights. Still, Noa wound up taking a streetcar to Aquavitae Common, which was right in the middle of the city. Supposedly it was where the watering hole that Zootopia was founded on had been located.

The park itself was a large pond (though from Noa's lapine perspective, it was something like a small lake) surrounded by grass and dirt paths, hemmed in by tram tracks. To Noa's dismay, there wasn't that much tree cover.

Still, it gave Noa some idea of where everything was – including Judy's workplace. The headquarters of the Zootopia Police Department - Precinct 1 – was a large, imposing building with thick, square columns. Clearly, it was designed to leave an impression.

Other central buildings for Zootopia surrounded Aquavitae Common. Opposite Precinct 1 was City Hall, a tall, hoof-shaped building. As Noa sat down on a bench with her back to Precinct 1, she made a note of Zootopia Central Station to her left, which acted as the city's main railway hub, as well as the Natural History Museum to City Hall's right, and the Central Branch of the Zootopia Public Library, which lay behind Noa and to the right, across the street from Precinct 1.

Having selected a bench already, Noa just sat back, crossed her legs, and reestablished contact with Judy.

_{Okay, Judy… Where are you at?}_

_{I've just started the OS up… I've got the Ingram Operator's Manual on my lap, and my hands are getting all sweaty already.}_

Noa glanced around the park. Nobody was giving her a second glance. She might have given the giant pair of ears poking out from behind a pile of savanna-style rocks a more suspicious glance, but because Noa Izumi wasn't familiar with any large-eared creatures (other than Judy), the sight bore no significance to her.

* * *

Finnick grumbled as he looked at the bunny doe sitting cross-legged on the park bench. She hadn't seemed to have noticed him. So far so good, but this was _not_ how the diminutive fennec fox had envisioned spending his day.

Since his partner in hustling, Nick Wilde, had gone straight and joined the police force, the little fox had been left at a crossroads. Hustling had been difficult with just him, so now he was contemplating going straight too, but that just led to the problem of what exactly he'd do with himself.

He'd mulled over food preparation (making Pawpsicles had taken a bit of know-how), auto repair (he'd get that van of his back to mint condition if it was the last thing he did!), and being a private detective (having a friend on the force would help there). However, Finnick's small size made it hard to get into the former two trades, and knowing his luck, his career as a private dick (wasn't that term just fitting?) would probably consist of spying on people for their paranoid spouses – not unlike what he was doing now…

Finnick wasn't an idiot. He could tell that Judy had flipped something in Nick's brain. He just wished Nick would quit keeping everyone in suspense and marry that stupid bunny already!

Still, Finnick felt weird about this situation – Nick had seemed to feel that way as well…

* * *

" _Look, just tell me what's wrong with that bunny o' yours!" Finnick growled, becoming impatient as he took a swig from his water bottle._

" _If I knew that, I wouldn't be asking you this, Finn!" Nick grumbled through the phone._

" _But why me? Why not ask one of your new cop friends?"_

" _Because she'll be off duty for the next few days and I won't be." said Nick. "Look, I just want to know if she's doing anything weird, seeing anyone sketchy… I just want to know what's got her so… funny…!"_

* * *

'Funny'?

Finnick wasn't sure what his old partner had meant – after all, Finnick didn't know Judy as well as Nick did.

Still, what Judy was doing now caught his attention. The bunny was crossing her legs on the bench and closing her eyes.

Now _that_ rang some alarm bells. Nick had had a good laugh with Finnick once about how uneasy Judy had felt when going into Mystic Springs Oasis. From what Finnick _did_ know about the ZPD's first rabbit officer, she wasn't the New Age-y type. Now she looked to be deep in concentration.

What was going through that bunny's mind?!

* * *

 _{Advanced Vehicle Model 98 – aka. the Ingram Patrol Labor. Weight: 6.02 tons. Height: 8.02 meters. SCB powerplant._ **[** **1]** _SCLM drive system._ **[2]** _Armed with an electromagnetic baton, as well as 37-millimeter revolver cannon. Designed specifically for police use so as to make a psychological impact on the community – deterring crime while also making the public feel safe-}_

 _{Noa…!}_ Judy rolled her eyes, _{You're literally just quoting the back of the operator's manual- Wait, did you memorize that?!}_

Judy caught a mental sigh from Noa. _{Just tell me what simulation Shige gave you.}_

 _{I think Shige named these himself,}_ Judy looked through the level names on the simulator's menu screen, _{'cause he told me to start with the level marked 'BASIC Basic Basic Movement.'}_

_{We'll go with that one then.}_

Judy selected that level, and took a deep breath. Somehow, this felt like the next step in being a police officer…!

_{Okay... here goes...!}_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yyyyyeaaaaah... I imagine strange things happen when two subconsciouses get rammed into each other...
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **MISC. FOOTNOTES:**
> 
>  
> 
> 1) SCB: Superconductive Battery Cells
> 
> 2) SCLM: Superconductive Linear Motor
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **BACKGROUND MUSIC:**
> 
>  
> 
> OST1) Kenji Kawai - "Black Destroyer - Griffon" - from _Patlabor: The Mobile Police_ TV series


End file.
